Under the Stairs
by septasonicxx
Summary: SEQUEL to In the Library. How much will Hermione risk to be with Draco? Can she even trust him at all? Dramione. Draco/Hermione.
1. Chapter 1

He raised his wand in a swift movement, pointing it directly at the man in front of him and clenching his teeth tightly together. He could do this. He would do this. He _had_ to do this.

Dumbledore opened his mouth but Draco quickly shouted, "Don't even think about it!" in order to silence him. He knew that if the man said anything it would weaken him and he may not end up being able to do it.

Taking a deep breath, Draco brought the words that he needed to the front of his mind. Just two small words and it would be over and he could walk away knowing he'd succeeded. But he could almost imagine the look on Hermione's face as she discovered Dumbledore dead and knew who had done it.

He suddenly shook his head sharply, clearing his thoughts away and raising his arm a bit again as it had dropped slightly.

"Please just let us ta-"

"Shut up! I don't care what you have to say." Draco snarled, his eyebrows narrowing. Why was his Headmaster leaning against the ledge, appearing so weak?

"I want to help you." Dumbledore said sadly.

"I don't need your help!" Draco shot back, his heart pumping fast. "Because I'm going to _kill_ you as my first msision. Yes, that's right. The Dark Lord let me join." In a moment of pride, he moved to push up the sleeve of his left arm, exposing his dark mark.

"You're not fooling anyone, Draco," Dumbledore said quietly. "We both know that if you had wanted to kill me you would have done so already."

Draco let go of his sleeve and pointed his wand back at Dumbledore again, eyes blazing with anger at being so offended. Of _course_ he was going to kill him! It was what he had been working at doing all year!

"I don't believe you've been very determined to kill me throughout the year with your other, smaller plans," Dumbledore continued. "Perhaps something has been distracting you?"

"Shut up!" Draco snapped again. "You think you know everything, but you don't. I _have_ to do this!"

The door behind Draco which opened to stairs leading down into the castle was flung open then and Draco glanced over his shoulder in panic, but relaxed again as he saw Death Eaters. Bellatrix walked over to him and smiled one of her sickly smiles which terrified Draco.

"Well done," she murmured to him. "Now finish him."

Sweat broke out on Draco's head and he felt as though all sound around him had suddenly vanished and all he could hear was the thumping of his heart. It hurt his head each time it pounded and he wished he could make it go away but knew he had to focus on what he was about to do.

He opened his mouth to speak the two words which would finish his task but suddenly found his throat dry and his tongue wasn't working. He saw Hermione in his mind and her terrified face as she looked down at Dumbledore's dead body. He was vaguely aware of Bellatrix saying something else to him when suddenly he was shoved backwards and Snape stepped in front of him.

"No," Draco croaked out, his voice sounding weak. He didn't want Snape to do this!

But in the next second he saw a flash of green and Dumbledore was falling backwards, disappearing over the edge. A hand grabbed Draco's arm and he was pulled back to a world of sound in a sudden, startling instant. He found himself racing down the stairs and through the castle with the other Death Eaters, images of terrified students flashing past as they ran.

Everyone was going to know him for who he was.

"Draco!" someone screamed, and Draco couldn't help but turn his head to look as he ran. He stumbled then, his eyes widening in horror as he saw Hermione sprinting out from another corridor nearby, but someone helped steady him and he continued running. He forced himself not to look back and fought against the urge he had to vomit.

"Coward!" someone else yelled from behind as Draco and the other Death Eaters made it out onto the grass, running as fast as they could for the gate so that they could disapparate once they were out of the Hogwarts grounds.

Bellatrix grabbed Draco's arm to pull him along faster just as Snape fell back.

"Let me go!" Draco suddenly shouted, fighting against Bellatrix.

"You can't go back now, you idiot!" she replied just as stubbornly. "You made that decision when you agreed to the task!"

Draco turned to look over his shoulder, watching as Snape fired a curse at Harry which sent him hurtling backwards. But then something else caught his eye and his mouth fell open as he saw Hermione running far along to the side between trees and behind bushes, doing her best to keep up with them.

What on earth was she trying to do? Get herself killed?

Did she honestly think she would be able to save him, still? She couldn't possibly still be in that dream. She had to be smarter than that.

The grinding sound of gates opening made Draco snap his head around to the front again and he found himself being pulled through the small gap between them and then being shoved down onto the ground as Bellatrix turned to help shut them again.

"Wait for Snape!" someone called out, making Bellatrix and the other Death Eater who had been trying to shut it back away again.

"He can shut it himself when he gets through, then." Bellatrix said as she pushed some of her hair out of her face. "Oh, get up Draco." She then reached down and pulled him off the ground forcefully.

"Who's gonna take him?" one of the other Death Eaters asked, glancing at Draco.

"Snape can, seeing as he just effectively saved his life back there." Bellatrix said, sneering at Draco before disappearing before his eyes. The others all followed suit and Draco suddenly found himself standing there by himself.

But not for long.

In only a moment, Hermione had dashed through the gap in the gate and attached herself to his arm, breathing heavily and staring up at him with red eyes sore from crying.

"Do you have _any_ idea what you're doing?" Draco snapped instantly, not allowing her appearance to affect him in any way and instead channelling his frustration from not carrying out his task into his voice. He wanted her to understand just how angry he was right now.

"Of course I know what I'm doing!" Hermione said, biting her lip and avoiding his eyes.

"You do, do you? Well, I know where I'm supposed to be going right now and I'm going to go there. Either you can let go of my arm right now or come with me." Draco hissed at her. She was silent for a moment, still not looking in his eyes, when they heard the tell-tale sounds of Snape getting closer.

"I..." Hermione looked worried, glancing over her shoulder and then looking up at Draco again.

"Hold on tight then." he murmured, carefully sliding his arms around her to pull her close to him and then closing his eyes, turning on the spot and disapparating.


	2. Chapter 2

Hermione opened her eyes and looked up at Draco, who still had his arms around her protectively. She then glanced past him at the room they were in and couldn't help but widen her eyes in shock at how large it was, considering the fact that it was a bedroom.

"Where are we?" she whispered.

"My room." Draco said softly, but he sounded as if his mind was elsewhere so Hermione glanced back up at him again, frowning. He was staring down at her with such a tender look that made Hermione wonder whether it was the same Draco or not.

"Are you okay?" she asked him cautiously and watched as his eyes narrowed ever so slightly, now making it appear that he was focusing on what she was saying.

"I'm fine. But we need to get you somewhere they won't find you-"

"You never told me you could apparate so well." Hermione interrupted him thoughtfully.

"I-" Draco frowned and paused, his expression showing that he was struggling with himself. Then he sighed. "Snape gave me special lessons on it to help me improve my skill."

"But how? You could only apparate inside the castle during the scheduled classes." Hermione said with a frown.

"We went to Hogsmeade." Draco said shortly.

"What days?" Hermione probed, now wondering whether – if she found that Draco's lessons had been very frequent – she would find out if Harry had still been going to his occlumency classes.

"I- I don't know! It was more at the beginning of the year because I got the hang of it after a while." He scoffed quietly to himself and added, "A long while."

"Was it most nights? Or did you go in the mornings?" Hermione enquired.

"What is your problem?" Draco hissed, pulling her closer so their faces were almost touching and glaring directly into her eyes. "You're in my manor, where all the other Death Eaters are, and you're asking about my apparating lessons!"

Hermione's face paled and she swallowed, fear creeping up her spine as the realisation of the situation hit her.

"I'm sorry-"

"Don't be." Draco said instantly, the small smile on his face suggesting he had known she was going to say that. He leant in just a sliver more so that their lips were touching and then pulled away again. "I have a question for you."

"What is it?" Hermione asked breathlessly.

"I want to know why you came with me." he said.

Hermione was silent in shock for a moment, having not expected him to ask her anything along those lines. After a moment she sighed and looked down, her thoughts going over everything that had happened recently.

"I couldn't leave you," she murmured. "But did you actually...?" She trailed off and bit her lip nervously, wishing she hadn't said the last bit. He would probably send her away.

But he hadn't _really_ done what she thought he had done, right? He couldn't have killed Dumbledore. She just didn't think he had it in him to do it.

"Dumbledore's dead, if that's what you're asking." Draco said coldly and stiffly, dropping his arms from holding Hermione and stepping back slightly. Hermione wrapped her own arms around herself and shuddered, squeezing her eyes shut tight and trying her hardest not to cry.

"I didn't... I didn't think you'd do it." Hermione blubbered quietly, turning away from him as well as if trying to block him out.

"Now you wish you hadn't come." Draco said with dry humour.

"I can't believe it... I just-" Hermione wiped at her eyes and turned back to him, looking up at him. "Why did you do it? _How_ could you do it?"

"Are you hungry?" Draco asked, attempting and succeeding at diverting Hermione's attention. She frowned in confusion and stared at him, remaining silent for a few moments.

"You're right," she said finally. "We shouldn't be arguing right now. How are you going to get food to me?"

"I don't know. I don't think I'll be able to." Draco shrugged. He knew he was upsetting her, because her face fell as soon as he said it, but he couldn't help it. He was angry at her for coming with him and then changing her mind.

She had given him hope when he had told her to choose whether she still went with him or not and she hadn't let go. He might even go so far to say he had felt _giddy_ and it hadn't just been because of apparating.

But she had shattered all of that with three words, 'did you actually...?'

"Maybe I should go back." Hermione said quietly, interrupting Draco's thoughts.

"Why?" he asked.

"Because you obviously don't want me here!" Hermione hissed, wiping at her eyes again. "You don't want to talk about Dumbledore – and I don't blame you – but you won't even cooperate with figuring out something to do so that I can stay here! The best thing to do is for me to leave."

Draco didn't move. He stared at the ground and clenched his teeth to keep himself quiet. He refused to say anything to try and make her stay. It was her decision. And he was not desperate. She could go for all he cared! Besides, he was a Death Eater now.

"One last thing before I never see you again," Hermione said, her voice so quiet that Draco had to strain to hear it. She also sounded as though her life was draining out of her and without even thinking he had looked up at her again. "Did you ever love me, or have you just been stringing me along for fun?"

"What do you think, Granger?" Draco chuckled, deliberately masking his discomfort from seeing her so vulnerable.

The effect was almost instantaneous. Hermione simply crumpled inwards on herself and fell to her knees on the ground, smothering her sobs with her hands and shaking uncontrollably.

"Why did you- why did you kiss me?" she gasped out accusingly. "Why did you waste your time with me for so long?"

Draco watched her in silence, choosing not to answer.

"You are _not_ worth it." she struggled to her feet, still shaking and crying, and turned to the door.

She had opened it and darted out before Draco could react and he was left to run forward too late and watch as she disappeared from his view.

"You have a death wish, Hermione." Draco muttered.

But he didn't go after her.


	3. Chapter 3

Hermione hugged her legs close against her, her face buried against her knees as she cried. She didn't want to believe the truth that Dumbledore was dead. What was going to happen now, anyway? Without Dumbledore, was there any chance they would be able to stop Voldemort? It wasn't that she doubted Harry's ability... he just had so much that Dumbledore hadn't taught him yet!

Quickly stifling her sobs, she drew further back into the shadows, her back hitting the wall as she heard someone walking down the stairs above her.

When she had run from Draco she had almost been discovered, but just in time had jumped over the railing of the staircase she was standing on and found herself in a dark alcove between the stairs and the large stone pillar which they curved around. She doubted anyone would look for her here, but that also depended on whether she was able to keep silent.

Once the person who had walked down the stairs left to go into another room, Hermione breathed a silent sigh of relief. She couldn't believe she had been stupid enough in the beginning to go running out of Draco's room without even checking to see if the coast was clear, so now she was constantly paranoid that someone was going to jump out of nowhere and find her.

She was only left to her thoughts briefly before the footsteps returned.

"Draco, wait a moment."

Hermione bit her lip to keep silent, tears threatening to make her choke. She couldn't deal with having him so close again so soon! She needed time to think. Time to get over him so that the next time they met she could look him in the eyes and tell him she didn't care any more.

"I don't want to talk about it," came Draco's voice. He sounded incredibly angry about something and Hermione couldn't help but wonder whether he was upset with himself for saying what he had to her. But that was silly. He'd probably already forgotten her.

"I have to tell you something. I don't want you to keep feeling bad about not being able to carry it out, alright?" By now Hermione was positive it was Mrs Malfoy speaking to Draco as she'd managed to place the voice.

"Feel bad?" Draco laughed. A creak on the stairs signalled him turning around.

"Then perhaps you're relieved?" his mother asked him curiously.

"Just tell me what you wanted to tell me and get it over with." Draco snapped angrily. There was a sigh and then another set of footsteps entered the scene.

"Bit testy, are we Draco?"

It was Bellatrix Lestrange.

"Leave us alone." Draco said immediately.

"Why? I want to see your face when she tells you." The woman laughed shrilly, obviously enjoying herself a lot.

"Draco, listen," Narcissa spoke again before Draco could respond. "I'm the one who asked him to take over if you couldn't do it. He made the unbreakable vow."

"You _asked_ him to? What kind of a mother are you?" Draco yelled, quickly walking down the stairs and, Hermione imagined, standing right in front of his mother to try and intimidate her.

"I wanted to protect you." Narcissa said softly.

"Protect me? From what, exactly? Dumbledore was so weak he could have collapsed! Besides, I doubt he would have hurt a student." Draco scoffed. Hermione felt another wave of anguish as she heard his name and had to put a hand over her mouth to stop from crying aloud.

"To protect you from having to deal with having killed someone at such a young age! You're only sixteen, Draco!" Narcissa exclaimed, sounding close to tears herself.

"Well congratulations! You succeeded!" Draco shouted.

"Go to your room!"

There was dead silence for a moment and Hermione had to force herself to keep breathing as she waited in anticipation. But then calm footsteps began heading up the stairs and Mrs Malfoy sighed in relief, walking out of the room with Bellatrix in tow. The encounter was over.

Hermione wanted to run up and ask Draco if he was alright, but he wouldn't want to talk to her and she knew it. After all, he'd never liked her in the first place.

She was the one that had fallen for the trick. She had helped him when he hadn't even liked her at all and he had been _deliberately_ using her.

Some people couldn't be rescued. Hermione had to come to realise that fact.


	4. Chapter 4

Hermione wasn't sure how long she'd been down there, sitting in the dark with her knees tucked up under her chin and her arms holding herself together. She had tear stains on her face which wouldn't surprise her if they were now permanent. All she really, really wanted, was to go back home.

But how was she supposed to leave if she was surrounded by Death Eaters? Although she had stopped listening to what they said, she still heard them talking above her as they walked up and down the stairs. She wasn't sure whether she care about being found any more. Fear had left her body and she just felt numb.

Truthfully, there was one voice which she couldn't ignore. Whenever she heard it she sat up straighter, pressed her hands against the wood of the staircase and tried not to cry, thinking of how she had been fooled.

She wasn't sure how long it had been since she'd last eaten.

What would happen if Voldemort won? What if he defeated all the good people in the world and continued to live here with his followers? Would she die here, from starvation?

Burying her face in her knees, Hermione willed herself to cry. But after doing so almost every day for who knows how long, she just didn't have anything left within her. She felt so weak and could feel her mind slipping. Was she just losing her mind because of Draco's rejection? Had it really only been one day and her mind was lying, telling her it had been longer?

Something landed with a bang beside her and she jumped in fright, lifting her head and looking down at the object. Drawing her eyebrows together in confusion, she wondered who's wand had suddenly found her. Was it enchanted? Beginning to panic, she pushed back further into the dark, wondering whether she was about to be dragged out and killed.

"Oh, Merlin."

She had to shove a hand over her mouth to stop from making a sound, because she knew that voice. What was he doing? Was that...? It was his wand. He'd probably had it in his hand, been holding onto the railing at the same time and then accidentally dropped it.

She knew he would come to get it.

How was she supposed to hide in time? Where would she go? How could she stop him from seeing her?

Closing her eyes, Hermione hoped he would simply accio it.

The railing on the stairs creaked slightly and Hermione could picture Draco leaning over it to see where exactly his wand was.

_Accio. Accio. _Hermione chanted silently in her mind, hoping Draco would somehow pick up on her thoughts and say the word for himself. She didn't need the problem of him seeing her again. As much as she had tried, she hadn't been able to make herself get over him.

Draco's wand rose up and then fell again, causing Draco to groan loudly before stepping back from the railing.

Running a hand through his hair, he first glanced up and then down the stairs, checking to see whether anyone was watching before moving forward and climbing over. He knew there were some Death Eaters talking in the room just at the bottom of the stairs, and if they heard him saying 'accio wand' they would no doubt come and laugh at him for losing it in the first place. He had tried saying it in his head, but apparently he wasn't quite good enough at silent spells yet.

Carefully dropping down onto the floor space and reaching down to grab his wand, he suddenly froze.

Turning slowly, he then set eyes on another person and his mouth fell open, causing him to straighten up again and step back away from her.

"H-Hermione?" he asked.

"I'm sorry. I didn't think you'd... come down here." Hermione lowered her head and tried to keep herself under control so she didn't start dry-sobbing. He didn't need to see that.

"You're alive." he said.

"I'm sorry to disappoint." she whispered, trembling slightly.

"I-" Draco found himself at a loss for words and he couldn't find the reason why. No, that wasn't right. He knew the reason. He didn't know what to say because the last time they had spoken she had been angry and he had... lied. Terribly.

"I won't mind if you leave, now." Hermione said softly. "I know you want to."

Draco slowly ran his eyes over her frightened and curled up figure. There were tear stains covering her face and he wondered how much she had cried.

"Have you been here the whole time?" he asked quietly.

"Yes. There was nowhere else to go because I didn't want to be found. Please, Draco," Hermione swallowed nervously and avoided his eyes. "Please don't tell them where I am."

"I won't." he said firmly, the words sounding like a promise. Slowly, Hermione looked up.

"Is he... is Dumbledore really dead? I heard your mother..."

"Yes."

Hermione paused.

"But you didn't do it. You couldn't. See, I knew there was still some good in you. Even if- if it's not focused towards me. It's still there. Somewhere, beneath the surface. And one day others will be able to see that too, because you will have done something even better than refusing to kill. I know it. I don't know how, but I do. I just... I want you to know that even if you don't love me, there's still good in you and you should embrace it."

Hermione found herself sobbing again and turned her face away from him, wishing she could have stopped herself.

Draco felt as though someone had kicked him in the gut. He was such a _coward!_ To think that he had lied to her because of his reputation, his fears. To think that he had used her. He had laughed in her face and even cheated on her.

How could she still see good in him?

"You're wrong Hermione," he said in a whisper, kneeling down to her level. "I will never do anything good in my life ever again. It's not who I am. Besides, everything I've done in the past proves that I'm not capable of turning around now. There's no hope for me, not even if I wanted to change-"

"Shut up, Draco." Hermione pushed some hair out of her face and glared up at him, her hands shaking. "Just shut up."

Draco would have moved away from her if there had been room to, but because of the small space all he could do was move his head slightly. He wasn't sure what she was thinking and that worried him. She was a smart witch, much smarter than himself, and that often meant she caught him unawares with things she said.

"Anyone can change," Hermione continued slowly. "If they want to."

Draco shook his head. "No Hermione, even if I tried my hardest from now on to be good, who would believe me? Who would be able to accept me? There is no hope."

"I would believe you! I would accept you, Draco. And if that isn't enough for you since you don't love me, then let me prove to you that others would be able to accept you in time as well!" Hermione begged, bravely reaching out to put a hand on his shoulder.

"Prove? How would you do that?" Draco asked sceptically, raising one eyebrow. He was also choosing to pretend he hadn't heard what she had said about him not loving her. He did. But he wasn't about to admit it again yet.

"Help me get out of here and I'll take you to the Order. They'll protect you and they will, in time, come to accept you." Hermione said slowly.

"No way! They all hate me, Hermione! They think I killed Dumbledore! I can't-"

Hermione quickly shushed him, biting her lip nervously and glancing up before turning back to him again.

"Then I'll keep you hidden! But please Draco, we both know I can't stay here! Please, just help me escape!" she said, her eyes filled with sorrow as she gazed at him.

"Hermione... I don't know if-"

"Please," she whispered, cutting him off again. "Just try."

* * *

This chapter is dedicated to:

tat1312

cyn23

fantasia-49

edwardsoneandonlylove

For reviewing this story as well as In The Library

Also:

missdracomalfoyxoxo

For being my personal fan girl =]


	5. Chapter 5

What can I say, What can I do  
This is who I am and I'm hurting you  
What can I say, what can I do  
No matter how strong my feelings are  
I always end up hurting you

WHAT CAN I SAY – DEAD BY APRIL

When Draco entered the kitchen the next day he was glad to see that no one was there. It was early in the morning and he was hoping that the other Death Eaters were all mostly night people and wouldn't like to get up at this time. It would give him a better chance at succeeding in what he was going to attempt.

But he still wasn't entirely comfortable as he grabbed some bread and headed back out, making his way through the rooms of his house until he reached the staircase leading up to the bedrooms. He continuously looked over his shoulder, wondering if someone was watching him in the shadows.

If he was caught...

It was better not to think about what would happen.

Walking to about the middle of the stairs, Draco glanced around once more before leaping over and landing silently on the ground below. Hermione was awake and looked up at him, startled, as he held out the bread to her.

"I thought you might be hungry since it's been a few days." he said stiffly.

With a smile she took it from him and ate it, cherishing each bite. She really _was_ hungry and had to try hard not to tear into the bread crazily.

"Thank you, Draco." she said sincerely.

"Don't mention it. You need your strength, anyway." he said flippantly.

"What for?" Hermione asked slowly, not wanting to get her hopes up. After Draco had left quickly the other day she had given up on hoping for anything.

Draco swallowed nervously.

"Tomorrow morning is what you'll need your strength for."

Hermione's eyes widened in horror and she stopped eating to stare at him. "They... they know? They know I'm down here? Oh Draco, what am I going to do!?" she exclaimed in terror, her arms already trembling in fear.

"What? Hermione, what are you talking about?" Draco asked in confusion. He didn't understand how she could have become so frightened so quickly.

"You mean..." Hermione bit her lip nervously and decided to start again. "What's happening tomorrow morning?"

"I thought I could try..." Draco shifted. "...getting you out."

Draco watched as a light suddenly returned to Hermione's eyes and wondered if she was going to leap up and hug him. He wouldn't be surprised if she did, but in the next moment she appeared to have reigned herself in and looked down again.

"Thank you. You have no idea how much I owe you." she said softly.

"You don't owe me anything-"

"You're going to try and get me out of here even though you don't like me, Draco," Hermione interrupted him. "That's definitely something I'll owe you for."

Draco watched her intently, seeing the honestly in her eyes as she looked up at him. He couldn't believe how much he had screwed up. She still thought he didn't like her! But how on earth was he supposed to make things right? There was no possible way that she would ever believe him again after what he'd said to her.

But did he need her to believe him? That was all he was working towards right now, wasn't it? He'd thought, subconsciously, that if he helped her out she'd believe his confession when he got around to telling it again.

But that wasn't important anymore. What was important was getting her out so that she wasn't found by any of the Death Eaters and killed. What did it matter if he never got to hang out with her like they used to such a long time ago in the library, as long as she was still alive?

"Hermione," Draco said then, having reached a decision. "I've changed my mind."

"What?" she asked in fear.

"Stand up. We're going now." he said, reaching a hand out for her and hiding his relief as she accepted it and used it to pull herself onto her feet.

"Why now?" she asked curiously and softly.

"Because there's no one around now," Draco said. "And the sooner we leave the better, or else we're just giving the Dark Lord and his... the other Death Eaters more chances to find you." He avoided her eyes then, knowing very well that he had just admitted to being a Death Eater. She didn't say anything either, so he figured she was just as bothered by it as he was.

Draco let go of her hand again then and turned to the railing, grabbing it and pulling himself up and over before turning back quickly and reaching for Hermione again. After helping her, he hurriedly steered her up the staircase and towards his room, shoving her in and then shutting and locking the door behind them.

"Are you sure about this?" Hermione whispered.

"Quiet." Draco said firmly, knowing that if he let her talk she'd only make him more nervous about what he was going to do. Grabbing her shoulders, he looked straight into her eyes. "As soon as we apparate they're going to know someone has left the mansion and since it's so early it won't take long for them to figure out who."

"Isn't the mansion blocked from apparation?" she questioned.

"Not the bedrooms," Draco explained. "There's no point since no outsider as ever seen into them so there's no danger of them being able to picture them to get here. So, do you understand what's going to happen?"

Hermione's eyes held a deep sorrow and she slowly reached out to grip the front of his shirt. "Yes, but do _you_?"

Draco couldn't tear his eyes from hers for a while, but finally he let go of her with one hand to pull his wand out of his pocket.

"Where do I apparate to?"

"You never answered me."

"Tell me where or I'll put you back where you belong!" Draco demanded, the hand still on her shoulder tightening slightly. Her shoulders drooped and she looked down at the floor, unaware of Draco's inner turmoil as he began beating himself up for what he had said.

"So you think I belong in there, trapped." she muttered. "Why even bother apparating me out then? We're in your room... I can go by myself."

"No you can't! They'll know someone left and once they realise no one's missing they'll know there was someone else here! I'll be right here when they start questioning!" Draco hissed at her angrily.

"Then leave me where you found me! It's not like I'll care!" Hermione choked out, turning her face away from him.

"Why is it that all we do is fight lately?" Draco asked softly in annoyance.

"Oh, I wonder," Hermione scoffed. "Maybe it has something to do with the fact you were _playing_ with me!"

Draco let go of her shoulder and stepped back, causing her hands to fall to her sides as well.

"No, wait, I didn't mean that!" Hermione began to apologise, eyes pleading with him for forgiveness.

That was so like her to say something completely true and then feel bad because she had hurt someone else with her words. Draco then realised he still hadn't spoken and sighed.

"You're absolutely right," Draco said to her. "I did say that. So now that we have that in the open and have reached an understanding... would you tell me where to apparate to?"

"No, not if it'll put you in danger that you don't want." Hermione shook her head.

"Don't you think that if I was really that reluctant I never would have contemplated it?" Draco exclaimed in exasperation.

"Look, you might regret this once we get there and I don't want that to happen! You're probably only doing this to try and apologise for leading me on and lying to me, so-"

"For Merlin's sake Hermione, did it ever cross your mind that I might be doing this because I don't want you to be killed? That maybe, just maybe, I'm doing this because I can't bear the thought of you being found by anyone else?"

Without letting her respond, Draco reached out and pulled her against his chest, closing his eyes and concentrating on Nocturn Alley before successfully apparating them there.

At least it was one step closer to wherever the Order was and it would show Hermione just how serious he was.


	6. Chapter 6

What if I just pulled myself together

Would it matter at all?

What if I just tried not to remember

Would it matter at all?

All the chances that have passed me by

Would it matter if I gave it one more try?

Would it matter at all?

WOULD IT MATTER - SKILLET

* * *

Silence.

Draco didn't quite know what to say as he stood in the darkness of one of Nocturn Alley's corners, pressed up against the wall with Hermione's face buried against his chest and her arms tightly wrapped around his neck. She was shaking.

Slowly, ever so slowly, Draco raised his own arms to hold her as well. He wanted to say something but he didn't know what to say. He didn't know where to go, either, so all he could do was stand there and wait for her to make the first move. He needed her now that he had left the Manor and there was no way he could change that.

"D-Draco," Hermione sobbed against him, gently picking her head up and staring into his face. "Why?"

There was no way he would ever be able to put into words why he had made such a drastic decision, but he knew if he simply stayed silent she would only feel worse. It was just like her to take an awkward silence as bad news.

Swallowing nervously, Draco began to lower his head. Maybe he couldn't say anything to explain it, but perhaps she'd understand if he just-?

A sudden stinging on his cheek made him jerk backwards and he stared in shock at Hermione as she glared up at him. She had actually _slapped_ him!

"What was that for?" he asked in a quiet hiss.

"You should know, Draco, that I'm going to help protect you no matter what. You don't have to continue pretending to be interested in me. I don't _want_ you to. It will only... it will only hurt me more." Hermione stepped away from him and clenched her fists at her sides. Draco was astonished that she'd admitted her weakness, and was also horrified that she still thought he was playing around.

"Where do we go from here?" Draco found himself asking. He wanted to hex himself for not explaining things to her but he didn't know how to say it!

"I can apparate us to the Order's headquarters." Hermione said, turning away to wipe inconspicuously at her eyes.

"You'll have to touch me to do that." Draco snarled, surprising himself with the venom that came out in his voice.

"You don't have to be such a prick, Malfoy," Hermione snapped in response, still not facing him. "I just need a moment."

Draco sighed and leant his head back against the wall, closing his eyes. He would give her the moment she wanted and use it to relax himself a bit as well. If they kept arguing like this Hermione would quickly lose her temper and decide to leave him behind. He couldn't risk that. He needed her now that everyone in Malfoy Manor was probably running around searching to find out who was missing.

They might have already figured it out, though.

What had he been thinking? Just because he had some unexplainable feelings for Hermione he was going to throw away his life and run to the Order? There was no way they would accept him, despite what Hermione had told him.

What if they killed his mother because he'd run away?

Suddenly pushing away from the wall, he moved past Hermione and took a shaky breath and paced in the small alleyway. Could he go back and apologise for 'the nerves which made him run away', begging to be pardoned because he'd returned and hadn't spoken to anyone? Would they believe him? Even if they didn't, could he save his mother by presenting himself for torture instead?

"Draco! What's wrong, Draco? You're crying-" Hermione reached out for him, distress in her voice as she clutched onto his shoulder to try and stop him in his sharp pacing.

"I'm so _stupid_!" he growled under his breath. "They're going to kill her now because of me! I never should have left. I have to go back, Hermione! If I go back, maybe they'll kill me instead of my mother."

"Draco, you can't go back!" Hermione gasped, her fingers pulling desperately at him, trying to make him stop his frantic movements. "I can't let you do that!"

"So you'll let my mother die?" he asked angrily, rounding on her and shoving his face in her own, his eyes dark with anger and his lips curled in a snarl.

"I'm sorry... I didn't think about that." Hermione whispered, dropping her gaze from his own. He didn't move away, although his expression softened until it was neutral again.

"Don't be sorry," he sighed. "I didn't think of it either until just now."

"Then... I'll come back to the Manor with you." Hermione said softly, wincing as Draco stepped away hurriedly. "Please don't argue, Draco-"

"I am not putting you in danger ever again, Hermione. I want you to go to the Order and keep safe. I still might be able to think... think of something to say..." Draco frowned and looked away.

"Draco-" Hermione began to say, pain in her eyes as she saw his own fear. She would have continued speaking, but Draco suddenly froze and turned his head slightly to the side before spinning to face her and shoving her back into the dark corner, hiding her completely with his own body which he pressed against hers, hoping desperately that the darkness would swallow them and they wouldn't be seen.

"There's nothing down there but a dead end," came a faint voice which Draco recognised to be one of the other Death Eaters. A grunt came from their companion and then they retreated.

"Sorry," Draco murmured quietly as he stepped back again. "I didn't want them to find you."

Hermione was looking down, her body shaking slightly. Draco wondered if she was going to reply or not, but when she continued to be silent, he turned away and ran a hand through his hair, deciding it was time to figure out what to do.

"If I go back and say that I didn't speak to anyone, the Dark Lord will check to see if I'm telling the truth." he said quietly, knowing it to be true. "Then... he'll find out about you."

Hermione squeezed her eyes shut tight and a tear slipped out. She bit her lip to stop the sob which wanted to come out and allowed Draco to continue speaking half to her and half to himself.

"But if I don't go back he'll kill my mother as punishment." Draco sighed and rubbed his eyes. He couldn't see how this was going to work. Someone was going to end up dead in the end and it was most probably going to be someone he cared about very deeply. "I don't..." Draco swallowed and turned around to face the frail form of Hermione. "I don't know what to do."

Hermione took a shaky breath and wiped her eyes again, straightening up to look into Draco's eyes. He was so handsome in her eyes, even when he was a nervous wreck having to choose what path to take. She loved him.

"I do," she whispered, her breathing still shaky.

"Y-you do? Then tell me!" Draco pleaded, stepping over to her again and putting his hands on her shoulders, studying her face that was full of sorrow. Was she going to tell him to do something he didn't want to do?

"Before I- before I tell you, there are some other things I need to say." Hermione said, swallowing and looking down at her fidgeting hands. She tried to stop them, but she found she had no control and soon gave up.

"What is it?" Draco asked.

"All those times we met up," Hermione began slowly. "All those times we grew closer to each other and began to trust each other... I treasure them. I want you to know that. I wouldn't change anything that happened if I had the chance to do it all over again. Being with you... I love you Draco. You can't stop that from being true no matter how hard you try. I don't know if I'll ever get over you and you can laugh all you want, but I had to tell you. I don't care if you don't love me back. I just... have to keep you alive. That's all I need."

Draco's hands had slowly slipped off her shoulders as he listened to her talk and he felt as though he had been pierced through the heart to hear that him simply being _alive_ would keep her happy. She didn't care if he loved her or not?

"Hermione, there's something I have to tell you as well." Draco said in an almost-mumble. He swallowed and then wet his lips with the tip of his tongue, suddenly nervous. The only time he had admitted his feelings was when Potter was trying to break them apart and, although he had said it three times in that instance, it was still incredibly hard finding the will to say it now that they were the only two people to hear it. He had no audience he could later blame it on.

"What, Draco?" Hermione asked, watching him so intensely he began to fear she'd read it in his eyes before he got a chance to say it. This thought made him lower his eyes and he breathed in deeply before slowly letting it out again.

"I've- I've lied to you about so many things. You wouldn't _believe_ how many things I've lied to you about..." he allowed a slight chuckle but it quickly died off and he cleared his throat. When he glanced up momentarily he saw that Hermione looked terrified and quickly looked down again, preparing to keep going with his confession. "I told you that I faked our relationship. That I only befriended you so that you'd help me with the cabinet-"

"Draco, I told you not to-"

"Pretend? I'm not pretending Hermione." Draco snapped. "I lied to you about our relationship because I was afraid. I thought that it would be the right thing to do and that if you hated me for lying to you, you'd be out of my life and I wouldn't have to worry about you. But you never went anywhere! You followed me and... and even though I'm the one who lead to Dumbledore's death you still say that you love me!"

"I don't understand." Hermione whispered.

"I-" Draco found that his throat had dried up and had to force himself not to leave the confession for later. "I love you."

Hermione was frozen for a moment before his words seemed to truly effect her. Her eyes widened for a split second before they shut tightly and she was crying, her hands going over her mouth to try and stifle the sobs as she couldn't keep them in anymore.

Stomping on whatever it was in his personality that held him back, Draco pulled Hermione against his chest and held her. He kissed the top of her head and found himself never wanting to release her ever again. He couldn't imagine letting anything bad ever happen to her.

She pushed away too soon for his liking and looked up at him.

"I-I have a plan." she said, bringing them both back to what the conversation had been about previously.

"Yes." Draco said, nodding. "So what is it?"

Hermione was silent for a moment and Draco began to panic, seeing the look of pain in her eyes.

"I need you to close your eyes." she said finally, trying to smile reassuringly as he scowled.

"Don't you dare try to make a runner." Draco growled, clenching his teeth. He wouldn't be able to live with himself if he closed his eyes only to open them again to an empty alleyway.

Hermione sensed how distressed he was and reached out a hand, slipping it into his and squeezing gently to let him know she was right there.

"Now close your eyes." she said softly. Draco watched her for another few minutes, wishing he could read her mind or at least have an idea of what she was thinking by looking in her eyes. It was useless and finally he sighed deeply, closing his eyes and gripping her hand even tighter.

Hermione's tears started pouring down her face freshly again and she had to fight her hardest not to allow a sound to escape her mouth. He would hate her for this.

Despite that knowledge which threatened to tear her apart, she pulled out her wand with the hand that wasn't holding Draco's and slowly lifted it to the side of his head. There was only one way to ensure he and his mother both survived.

"I love you, Draco," she whispered through a sob, then quickly said, "_Deleonovo,_" before she could change her mind. She closed her eyes tightly and concentrated on altering every single one of his memories which involved her until their friendship was erased from his mind. She then implanted a new thought to ensure her plan worked and released him from the spell, letting go of his hand and stepping back.

She would have two minutes before he woke from his lulled state and although she knew that the faster she left the better, she couldn't help but linger and stare at his face.

Finally, she tore her gaze away and closed her eyes, turning on the spot and apparating to 12 Grimmauld Place to meet up with the Order.

When Draco Malfoy opened his eyes and saw himself standing in the dark alleyway of Nocturn Alley, he frowned for a moment. But then he remembered his terrified flee from the Manor as he experienced a moment of cowardice and shook his head firmly. Still slightly confused, he apparated back to his room, wondering why the words '_I have to return to save my mother and admit that I was a coward_' kept repeating strongly in his mind.

* * *

_A/N: The spell used by Hermione in this chapter to alter Draco's memory is known as the 'False Memory Charm' in the books. Since there was no incantation for it already, I used two latin words, Deleo(meaning erase) and Novo(meaning alter) and simply put them together._


	7. Chapter 7

Hermione pulled open the door to 12 Grimmauld Place and stepped inside, unsure whether anyone would be there or not. Depending on how long she really had been in the Malfoy Manor, the others might still be at Hogwarts, although she hoped they had returned here now.

Remembering Dumbledore's fate weakened her even more and she crumpled onto the floor, grief overwhelming her senses as she pushed back against the door to shut it. She then covered her face in her hands and cried freely, unable to keep it in any longer. Hearing her own sobs, she thought she sounded pathetic.

Engulfed in her own sorrow, she didn't notice anyone approaching until there was a hand on her shoulder and suddenly someone was hugging her tightly. Not caring who it was, she held them as well and cried onto their shoulder.

"Shh, it's okay, you're safe now."

The whispered words of comfort meant nothing to her. She wasn't crying about something that had happened to her but of things which had happened to other people. Dumbledore was dead. Draco would never think of her in the same way ever again. She had sealed their fate and knew that whatever happened now, they would not be able to reunite.

Someone pulled her to her feet and she wiped desperately at her eyes to try and clear her vision so that she could see who was with her. There were quite a few people now and finally she was able to see exactly who they were. The person who had been hugging her was Tonks.

Lupin, Kingsley and Harry also stood in the room.

"W-where's Ron?" Hermione asked, trembling.

"With his family," Lupin said uneasily. "Greyback did a lot of damage in the castle that night. What happened to you?"

"Wait," Hermione said, suddenly terrified. "Did someone-"

"Bill's okay, although he doesn't quite look like himself." Lupin said quietly, gesturing at his own face and silencing her. She covered her mouth with her hand again and looked down. Poor, poor Bill! Poor Ron, Ginny, Fred and George. Mr and Mrs Weasley-

"What happened to you, Hermione?" Harry asked, stepping over and hugging her. "We were so worried!"

"I-" she gulped and found herself unable to speak. How could she tell them she had run off with the person who had enabled all of those terrible things to happen?

"I thought you must have followed him and then been captured." Harry murmured into her hair, quietly so that no one else would hear what he said. They didn't need the others to know about her relationship with Draco.

"I hid," Hermione whispered back. "I followed him and then hid. He got me out. I _told_ you he was good, Harry!"

Harry stepped back and Hermione noticed the others watching them with questioning eyes, wondering what their murmurs to each other had been about.

"Look," Hermione began, addressing them. "What happened to me doesn't matter. I'm here and it's as if I was never gone."

"So you weren't captured?" Lupin asked, confused.

"No." Hermione shook her head.

"But then what-?"

"It doesn't matter!" Hermione snapped angrily. "I don't want to talk about it and that's that! Harry, come with me for a minute?"

Harry swallowed and nodded, following her out of the room away from the angry looks from all the others. They didn't like being kept in the dark.

"What's up?" Harry asked quietly when they were somewhere secluded.

"You don't have to worry about me running off with Draco ever again," Hermione said softly, another tear trickling out of her eye. "I altered his memory so he won't remember..."

"You- are you serious?" Harry asked, gripping her shoulders.

"Yes." Hermione swallowed and looked down, remembering what Draco had finally admitted to her moments before she'd had to erase it from his mind. He loved her. He actually _loved_ her! The pain travelling through her body of Draco never remembering any of their time together was smothered by this new thought and she let out a laugh before her body collapsed into more sobs and Harry had to hold her up.

"Hermione, you are the bravest witch I've ever known." Harry told her firmly.

But she didn't care. All she wanted was to run out the door again and apparate into Draco's room at the Malfoy Manor, find him and get him out. She wanted to save him from Voldemort's clutches.

"Hermione," a new voice interrupted them and they looked over to see Tonks standing in the doorway, sorrow on her face. "We can't help you if we don't know what happened. Please, tell us?"

Hermione shook her head and turned away. Erasing Draco's memory of their time together was as good as going back in time and changing the events so it never _had_ happened. Why tell them when it wasn't important anymore?

"I'm really hungry..." Hermione trailed off and Tonks nodded, disappearing to find something for the girl to eat.

"What else happened?" Harry asked gently. "Can you tell me the details?"

Sighing, Hermione began to explain what happened from the moment she'd seen Draco running through the castle with the other Death Eaters and decided to follow. Harry already knew enough, why shouldn't she tell him this?

* * *

Draco exited his room and was instantly seized by another Death Eater. Surprised, he began to struggle, but soon stopped as the man shoved him against the wall and yelled out, "He's here!"

Other Death Eaters exited rooms nearby and suddenly he was surrounded.

"C-come on, I'm sorry!" he stuttered. "I didn't talk to anyone! I went to Nocturn Alley and-"

"Oh, shut up." The Death Eater holding him rolled his eyes and began to drag him towards the stairs, towards where Draco knew the Dark Lord would be waiting to hear his excuse for apparating out. Still, the words from before repeated in his head, '_I have to return to save my mother and admit that I was a coward_'.

He was thrown into the room and landed on the floor with a thud, wincing. He didn't raise his head and held his breath as he heard the Dark Lord slowly approaching him. Then he could see his feet near his head and closed his eyes tightly. Fear flowed through his body and he shook from it.

"What could you have _possibly_ been doing outside the Manor, hm?" the Dark Lord asked lightly, his tone conversational despite the fact that Draco was face down on the floor. "No answer for me?"

Draco spoke only because he was terrified of what would happen if he didn't, saying, "I'm sorry, I-I was scared. I was foolish and cowardly."

The Dark Lord knelt down and Draco found his chin being lifted by the man's wand. He allowed the light touch to lift his head and still tried to avoid looking in the other's eyes.

"Where did you go?"

"N-Nocturn Alley." Draco mumbled.

"I can't hear you," The Dark Lord taunted.

"Nocturn Alley." Draco said, firmer than before this time.

"And you didn't tell see anyone or tell them where we are, did you? I don't think I'd be able to forgive you if you did..."

"No! I didn't! I swear!" Draco said urgently, meeting the red eyes for a second before he quickly looked away again, terrified.

The Dark Lord stood up and Draco relaxed slightly, lowering his head back down to the floor, but it was short lived as he had a moment's warning before pain burst in all his nerve endings and he screamed pitifully, writhing on the floor and trying to escape it.

"S-stop, _please_!" he screamed, scrabbling at the floor and only crying out louder as the pain intensified. He felt his back arch in pain and suddenly it was over as quickly as it had begun. He felt his body collapse onto the ground again and he kept his eyes closed, breathing slowly to try and get his strength back.

"Why did you leave?"

"B-because..." Draco floundered for a reason but he had none. Why had he left? He had absolutely no idea!

"Do you want to join the other side, Draco?" the voice teased and Draco shook his head from the floor.

"No, no I don't. Please, please, I'm sorry. I don't know why I left... I was just- I was scared!"

The Dark Lord was not in an easily forgiving mood and Draco was quickly writhing on the floor again. His screams of pain echoed in the room, becoming louder and more desperate when the end didn't come as quickly as last time. He was vaguely aware of someone else screaming but couldn't concentrate with his body so contorted from pain.

It was under his skin, everywhere, and in his mindless agony he began dragging his nails over his body to try and get it out. His throat was raw but he kept screaming, unable to stop. It felt as though he was losing his mind and he felt something shift inside it but didn't know what.

Then it was all over. He lay, gasping and freezing – though he didn't know why he felt cold.

His eyes widened as he felt his mind being invaded and he could see Nocturn Alley again. It was peculiar, watching himself stand awkwardly in the alleyway and hiding from Death Eaters who came searching. The unwelcome presence searched back further and Draco saw memories from Hogwarts, his attempts at killing Dumbledore and many, lonely trips to the library which seemed out of place.

He was left alone then, and felt strangely empty. He heard footsteps leaving but then another set came running and he heard sobbing as someone grabbed onto him.

"Draco, my Draco!" It was his mother, and he gladly turned into her and held her back. He revelled in the comfort she gave him and tried to stop his body from quivering in the after effects of the cruciatus curse.

"I-I'm fine." he muttered to her.

_'I have to return to save my mother and admit that I was a coward'_.

Why did he keep thinking that? Why had he been in the library so often that year, and why had he left a gap between himself and the bricks when he had thrown himself against the wall in Nocturn Alley?

Nothing added up anymore, but he didn't care. He would never try to leave again. He couldn't leave his mother unprotected.

As his father appeared on the scene to pull them both up and take them from the room, Draco found himself looking over at the staircase which lead up to his room. He was unable to explain why he suddenly had an urge to throw himself into the dark gap beneath them, closed in by the pillar, but assumed it was because he was so frightened and just wanted to hide.

He looked down at his hands, covered in his own blood, and stumbled.

Then everything went black.

_"Draco, I love you."_


	8. Chapter 8

Draco sat on the side of his bed staring down at his hands. They were clean now, and his wounds had been healed easily as they weren't very bad. The only thing he still suffered from was some unavoidable mental trauma.

He swallowed.

If the Dark Lord had wanted to he could have killed him in an instant. The fact that he'd only been tortured was something to be thankful for. At least he was now still alive to protect his parents as best as he could. Although, he wouldn't be much help.

For some reason, as Draco sat in his room he felt unexplainably tense. His interrogation with the Dark Lord was over, so he should have felt more relaxed since his story was believed and no one had died on account of him.

Sighing, he suddenly realised why he was so tense. It was because he didn't know why the Dark Lord _wouldn't_ believe him! He had gone through Draco's mind, so of course the only thing he could have discovered was the truth! That was what had Draco so tense. Was he hiding something? And if so, why didn't he know what it was?

The door opening made him jump in fright and he stood up instantly, looking over to see Snape standing there with a frown on his face.

"He wants to see you again," Snape said, jerking his head for Draco to come.

The fear within him escalated as he slowly walked towards the door and then out of it, heading back down to the place where he had been tortured before. If he _was_ hiding something from the Dark Lord, had it been realised and was he going to be punished again? How could it have been discovered if he didn't even know what it was, though?

Then he found himself standing in front of the Dark Lord and kept his head down carefully, being sure not to look up in case he was seen to be disrespectful.

"I spoke to Severus while you were whimpering unconsciously," the Dark Lord began slowly, making Draco wonder what the Professor could have possibly told him. "Look at me, Draco."

Swallowing, Draco lifted his eyes to meet the red ones which immediately seemed to see right through him to his very core. He shivered but kept his gaze steady, not wanting to be yelled at or punished if he could help it.

"Do you want to know what Severus told me?" the Dark Lord asked, narrowing his eyes slightly. "He told me you had befriended a mudblood in order to gain her help completing your task."

Draco fought to keep any trace of emotion off his face as he heard those words. He befriended a mudblood? Which one? Why couldn't he remember it?

"I had decided to speak to Severus because I could feel a barrier in your mind last time," the Dark Lord continued, looking proud of the uncertain expression Draco had been unable to keep off his face. "I wanted to know what to look for the next time I searched so that the task would be quicker. I want the whole truth of what you've been doing this year. Are you ready?"

Thoughts and memories, disconnected but clinging pathetically to the story Snape had given, floated in Draco's mind now. He remembered going to the library to talk to Granger and he remembered Snape speaking angrily to him. So he had befriended Potter's best friend? Why? He'd fixed the cabinet himself and didn't need her for anything!

"Yes..." the Dark Lord hissed quietly, suddenly alerting Draco to how intense he looked. He seemed to be concentrating very hard on something. "Why _did_ you befriend her? Tell me!"

Just as the Dark Lord began to lift his wand, apparently thinking that Draco would relinquish the answers faster under torture, someone came rushing forward to interrupt.

"No! Don't hurt him!"

The red eyes were cut off from Draco's view as his father came to a stop in front of him, his hands clenched into fists by his sides.

"You already know what happened," continued Lucius desperately. "Snape told you! Can't you let it go?"

Draco fought to dispel the fear which threatened to hold him in place and slowly turned around to see who else was in the room. Behind him, there was no one, but he knew that Snape was standing behind the Dark Lord silently. His father must have been the only other person. Where was everyone else?

"Step away, Lucius," the Dark Lord hissed. "There are still some questions I have no answers for."

"I'm not moving." Lucius said firmly, although there was a small tremble in his voice.

"Then you must be punished."

There was simply no more time to think things over. Draco spun around and began running, heading for the door that he had entered through. He had no idea what he was doing but couldn't stop, not even when he heard the screams coming from his father behind him and the roar from the Dark Lord before a curse raced towards him.

His hand found the door post and he swung around it, disappearing around the corner in record time but not quite fast enough as the curse hit his hand and he howled, losing his grip and sliding across the floor, his back slamming into the opposite wall. Holding his hand to his chest and groaning pathetically, he forced his feet to move again.

He found the stairs and began leaping up them, aware of the Dark Lord's voice yelling out to everyone within the manor and the sounds of the other Death Eaters emerging from everywhere, all obeying their masters orders to capture Draco Malfoy.

His room was right there, just to the side of the window which was at the top of the stairs. He could escape once he was inside it unless the Dark Lord somehow changed the apparating rules as well. It was so close, but suddenly a Death Eater exited the room right beside his and stepped in front of his door.

Skidding to a halt, Draco gasped to try and get his breath back. His hand was throbbing painfully and the pain was reaching his head, threatening to shut his mind down. What was he supposed to do now?

"If you stay exactly where you are," the Dark Lord's voice came up from the bottom of the stairs and Draco gulped, turning around to look down at the red eyes which were fixed on him. "I promise not to hurt you as badly as I want to."

But then the snake smirked and Draco's whole body shuddered terribly. He took a step back and the Dark Lord took a step up. Draco took another step and felt the window against his back, pressing in uncomfortably.

"All I wanted," the Dark Lord continued, taking another step. "Was to find out what had been erased from your mind. If you had let me do that you would not be in a life or death situation. You might only be in a mild-pain or a-lot-of-pain situation."

Draco's uninjured hand had somehow been wedged up between his back and the window and he slowly moved his fingers down to his back pocket where his wand was. His heart was pounding in fear and he only had half a plan, but he didn't have time to think it out.

"Relax, Draco," the Dark Lord murmured as he took another step up, his eyes still fixed on the boy's. "You can't hide anything anyway-"

Draco's uninjured hand, whilst holding his wand with two fingers, found the latch on the window. He knew this window very well since it was next to his room and as the Dark Lord got ready to say something else, he flung it open and then pushed himself with all his might outside it. Yells sounded and he caught a glimpse of the Dark Lord raising his wand in anger before he was falling at an incredible speed towards the ground below.

Closing his eyes tightly and squeezing his wand in his hand, he focused on St Mungo's as best he could while falling through the air. He could almost imagine the Dark Lord leaning out the window and murdering him before he had time to get away. His hand throbbed more from that thought and suddenly he couldn't breathe.

But as he landed on the ground with a thud he knew it had worked. He was still alive – gasping for breath, but alive.

He couldn't feel his hand anymore and wondered how long it would take for someone to find him. It had only been a split second decision to go to St Mungo's and he had chosen it simply because he was injured and needed help. Who knew what kind of curse the Dark Lord would use? What if- what if his hand could never be healed?

Anxious voices began moving closer and Draco could soon understand what they were saying.

"I've never seen anything like it before, but it's got to be fresh since he apparated in."

"Alright, thanks, I'll take it from here."

Dots began covering his vision and his throat was closing up.

"Excuse me Sir, can you hear me? Do you know what curse you've been hit by?"

Draco couldn't breathe anymore and panic filled him, making him unable to respond to woman's voice. His uninjured hand flailed about desperately, searching for something to grab onto. He felt another hand grab it tightly to reassure him but he started to choke and his body jerked pathetically as it tried to suck in air.

"Take him straight through! I've only seen an injury like that once in my life and I'm sure hoping I'm wrong right now!"

Feeling himself lifted up, Draco tried to relax despite the jerks his body was making and the very obvious problem of his inability to breathe.

_"What would you do if I told you I had only befriended you in the first place so that you would help me with the cabinet?" _

_"That can't be true." _

Draco felt the tip of a wand press against his throat and he could breathe again for a moment, his body sucking in as much air as he could get in that short amount of time before it closed up once more. Someone swore angrily from above him and he was vaguely aware of his cursed hand being moved around.

His problems seemed to fade into the background for a moment, though, as his mind connected more thoughts together than before. Faint memories were becoming stronger and he was completely overwhelmed by it all.

_"Did you ever love me...?"_

Love- _love_ her? Did he ever love her? Hermione Granger? Certainly _not_!

_"...did it ever cross your mind that...maybe, just maybe, I'm doing this because I can't bear the thought of you being found by anyone else?" _

Draco's body was shaking and jolting from more than just the curse infecting his body. Everything that was coming back in his mind was simply too much for him to handle. He didn't understand how it was possible! How had he ever thought of the mudblood as something more? It made him sick to contemplate!

"How's he doing?"

"I can't get him to stabilise! Go get Professor Helbert, _now!_"

"But she's over with Bill Weasley, she hasn't finished-"

"I don't care! Do you want this man to die?"

Footsteps quickly retreated and Draco convulsed again. He assumed one medi-witch had stayed with him because he, only shortly, found himself able to suck in another breath of air.

"C'mon, c'mon..." came the quiet chanting of the medi-witch at his side. He wondered just how bad his condition was. Would he ever see his parents again? Was he going to die right now, in St. Mungo's?

"_Draco!_"

The tortured scream reached his ears and he moaned as a sudden pain shot through his otherwise absent-of-feeling hand. He heard someone drop beside him and there was crying, but since his parents were at the Manor... who on earth was crying over him?

"Draco please, please!"

"Get back! I need space."

"You can't let him die! You _can't_!"

It was shocking to hear someone not related so distraught over him. The voice was familiar, but who was it?

_"Still want to help me?"_

_"Yes."_

That voice... he remembered it so clearly in his mind. He simply didn't have a face to put to it yet.

_"...I think I'd better go."_

_"Wait-"_

"Her-Hermione." Draco choked out.

* * *

_Draco's memories taken from earlier 'Under the Stairs', late 'In the Library' and the flashback in __ch7p2 of__ 'In the Library'._


	9. Chapter 9

A/N: So everyone, I was thinking that you should all leave a nice review for this chapter telling me what you think should happen next. Yes. You really should. Because I need inspiration. So review. PLEEEEEASE! Love you! =D

* * *

When Ron had arrived at 12 Grimmauld Place to see Hermione, he had almost fainted from shock before latching onto her and demanding answers. Thankfully, she managed to divert his attention by asking about Bill and he quickly began to talk about what happened and how his brother was doing.

"I'd stay here with you and Harry," Ron said as they spoke that afternoon. "But I promised mum I'd visit Bill again today since they're getting a specialist in to lessen the scarring and see if they can do anything for his eye."

"Oh," Hermione glanced over at Harry before looking back at Ron. "Would it be okay if I came along? I'd love to help support your family. It must be so hard seeing him like that..."

"Yeah, of course! Mum'll _love_ to see you there!" Ron said enthusiastically, grinning at her.

"Okay. When should we leave?" Hermione asked with a small smile, amused at how easy it was to sidetrack Ron and make him happy.

She was also incredibly relieved that she didn't have to answer his questions of where she had been and was glad that Harry hadn't said anything. He had displayed some very amusing facial expressions during the conversation which were thankfully overlooked by Ron, and Hermione could have kissed him for making such an attempt to keep her secret.

"What about now? The sooner we get there the less likely it is that mum will kill me." Ron chuckled dryly.

"Sure!" Hermione nodded, standing up. Ron and Harry followed suit and then the three of them, after telling another Order member where they were going, apparated to St Mungo's to see Bill.

Since Ron had been there before, he was able to land them in the corridor just outside Bill's room so that they didn't have far to walk. They didn't even have time to turn the door handle, however, when Mrs Weasley burst out of the room and flung her arms around them all.

"Oh come in, come in! It's so good to see you Hermione, and you too Harry! Come in, Bill needs some new people to talk to while he waits!"

Laughing, Hermione walked into the room and over to the bed where Bill lay. Her laugh died in her throat and she bit her lip as she looked down at him.

"How are you feeling?"

"Fine, actually!" Bill grinned, but stopped as Mrs Weasley came rushing over to his other side with a scowl on her face.

"You've been told not to smile, Mister!" she scolded angrily. "Even though you can't feel anything right now that doesn't mean you can't do more damage!"

"Yes, Mum." Bill rolled his visible eye – the other was bandaged – and then sighed.

"Well, this _is_ a crowd."

"Oh, Professor Helbert!"

Mrs Weasley rushed over to greet the Medi-witch who had just walked in and then brought her over to Bill's side. Hermione respectfully stepped back so that the witch could do her job without interference.

Silence fell on the room when Professor Helbert began murmuring incantations and slowly waving her wand above Bill's face. Hermione was astonished to see some of the scarring fade before her eyes.

Everyone jumped when a sudden bang disturbed the silence and Professor Helbert turned quickly to see who had been the cause of it. Her eyes were wide and angry but they softened as she saw the panic on the face of the medi-witch who had burst in.

"There's a man who just apparated in. His hand is bleeding and he can't breathe. I don't think he can see either-"

Professor Helbert didn't wait to hear more as she rushed for the door, abandoning the Weasley's for this new, more critical patient.

Curiosity brought Hermione to the door as well, innocently peering out to try and see just how badly hurt this other man was. Then, feeling as though her heart had just been stabbed in five different places all at once, she ran out and screamed the one name which she had been sure she wouldn't have to say again for a very long time.

He looked like he was already dead! She only knew he wasn't because he moaned and shifted, his head twitching from side to side. Hermione wasn't even fully aware of what was happening anymore as her knees thudded on the ground but when her arms reached for him she drew them back quickly. What if she hurt him by touching him?

A moment later she realised she was crying and used the back of her hand to wipe some of the tears away.

"Draco please," she choked out. "Please!"

"Get back!" Professor Helbert ordered firmly, a hand on Hermione's shoulder. "I need space."

"You can't let him die! You _can't_!" Hermione said desperately as she pushed herself back slightly to allow the Medi-witch room to move.

Draco's hand was suddenly in the air, reaching for something anxiously as his eyes darted around the room blindly. Hermione covered her mouth with her hand and hoped, as an afterthought, that her exit from Bill's room had gone fairly unnoticed so they wouldn't have even more questions for her.

A soft hand on her shoulder came before the quiet sigh and then Hermione turned to bury her face in the crook of Harry's neck. He hugged her tightly and she heard him begin to say something when they were interrupted by one simple, quiet word.

"Her-Hermione."

"Draco?" Hermione gasped, turning back to the blond in an instant and trying to fight off Harry's hands which held her back. "Draco, can you hear me?"

"Hermione don't!" Harry warned, but she wasn't listening.

"Fight Draco! You've got to fight it! Do you hear me? I'm not going to let you die!"

She was crying again.

"Please keep back!" Professor Helbert said sternly, obviously annoyed at the scene Hermione seemed to be making.

And quite a scene it was. Many people had come to see what was going on – including the Weasley's – and even some patients had gotten themselves out of bed to come see who was responsible for the noise.

Then, as Hermione wiped more tears from her face and continued to stare down at the sickly-pale face of Draco Malfoy, she remembered why it had been so shocking to hear him say her name.

She had wiped his memory. He wasn't supposed to remember calling her by her first name at all, so why had he said it? Had... had Voldemort found a way around the charm and allowed Draco to remember everything again?

That thought sent a rush of excitement and horror through her. How much torture had Draco endured before coming here?

"Hermione come on," Harry said gently. "Let Professor Helbert do her thing."

Hermione clenched her hands into fists and tried to stop herself from crying. It seemed almost impossible given the circumstance. She had been so convinced that she wouldn't see Draco again for a long time and now here he was right in front of her, bleeding! What kind of a curse had he been hit with?

"N-no! Filthy..." Draco was squirming on the floor and some other Medi-witches were trying to hold him still so that Professor Helbert could work without doing any damage. His voice was incredibly scratchy when it came out and Hermione feared badly for him since it was clear that he couldn't breathe yet was still trying to talk.

"Over here!" Professor Helbert instructed one of the witches, nodding when they held their wand above Draco's neck and allowed him more breaths.

Hermione found herself clutching Harry's hand so tightly she was amazed he wasn't complaining. Was he concerned for Draco's health too or simply there for her sake? Probably the latter. She doubted he would have changed his mind about the blond so quickly.

"I-I'd never!" Draco gasped out, his hand flailing again until it was held still by a Medi-witch.

"Do you know what he's talking about?" Harry asked softly, glancing down at Hermione's tear-stained face.

"I don't know what to believe anymore." Hermione whispered, closing her eyes as more tears escaped her eyes. Did Draco love her or not? If he had not said those things to her right before she wiped his memory she would have thought that his words now were referring to her. That he considered her filthy and didn't want anything to do with her now that the cabinet was fixed.

What if he was lying again when he said he loved her, though? How could she know he was telling the truth when he had lied so much?

But maybe... maybe he was only saying it because his memory was still wiped?

"_Mudblood_!"

A choked sob escaped her lips and she felt Harry pull her closer to him. What was going through Draco's mind as he lay there with Medi-witches trying to heal him?

"Do you think he remembers?" he asked.

"I-I don't know. I don't know!" Hermione whimpered.

Harry continued to comfortingly hug Hermione as Draco writhed on the floor and the Medi-witches spoke incantations to try and find out how to stop the curse which was spreading through his body. Even the on-lookers didn't know what to do and simply stayed where they were, watching.

But finally, the bleeding from Draco's hand stopped. His muddled words died in his throat and he lay still, calmly breathing. Hermione was slowly stepping towards him when Professor Helbert held up a hand to stop her and Draco opened his eyes again. The haze from before which showed that he couldn't see what he was looking at was gone.

"Draco..." Hermione said, swallowing nervously as his eyes found hers.

"Granger." he acknowledged quietly, confusion in his voice although he was trying to mask it. "What- what happened to me?"


	10. Chapter 10

Draco was furious. He couldn't believe Hermione had actually had the nerve to wipe his memory of everything that had happened between them when here they were, once again stuck with the same problem. The Dark Lord had found out and now his parents were going to be tortured – maybe even murdered.

What really got to him, though, was that she had wiped his memory moments after he had finally admitted, in all honesty, that he loved her. Could she have possibly acted more selfishly?

So what if he now did remember everything again? There was no way he was about to let her know that. If she wanted him memory-wiped and back to the mudblood – yes, _mudblood_ – hating self he was before, he would grant her wish. So he faked confusion as she called his name softly, his heart racing from the strain of hiding his anger at her.

And she had the nerve to look at him lovingly, hopefully, up until he called her Granger. Her face crumpled into sadness and she moved slightly closer to Potter.

She was a traitor.

"You don't remember?" she asked him softly, referring to his question of what had happened to him.

"No." he shook his head and closed his eyes. He didn't want to have to keep looking at her and seeing how upset she was.

"So you..." There was a pause. Hesitation. "What _do_ you remember?"

"Why do you care, Granger?" he asked with a sigh, hoping she would quickly catch on to the fact that he 'couldn't remember anything' and was 'still mind-wiped'.

When she didn't reply, Draco wanted to open his eyes and see what she was doing, but before he could the Medi-witch right beside him spoke.

"I need to get him into the critical unit so I can keep an eye on how he's doing. Would everyone please go back to what they were doing? Mrs Weasley, I'll be with you again in a moment."

Draco then did open his eyes so that he could see what the Medi-witches were doing and tried to stand up as they held his arms to guide him. When he was on his own two feet, he noticed his hand was covered in blood. No wonder it had been hurting so much.

He was then lead past Her-_Granger_ but deliberately didn't look at her or Potter. He was fed up with her always trying to help him and only succeeding in angering him or making things worse. He knew now that it was time to move on. She had given him the perfect excuse.

It didn't matter how he felt. She wasn't worth it.

_Funny, she said that about me once..._

When he reached the room he was to stay in, one of the Medi-witches helped him to the bed and then tried to help tuck him in.

"I'm not a child!" he snapped angrily, feeling humiliated. "I can do it myself."

"Sorry..." she mumbled, shocked. "Just don't get too comfortable yet, please. We still need to wash your hand."

"I can do that myself too!" Draco growled. He reached for his pocket and suddenly froze, his eyes widening. "Where's my wand?"

"Professor Helbert took it," the Medi-witch said quietly, taking a step back cautiously. "She didn't want you to accidentally hurt yourself."

"Well give it back! I'm not going to hurt myself with it now!" Draco said, horrified at what had been done. He need his wand back desperately! Without it he was no better than a muggle!

"But she said-"

"I don't care what she said!" Draco yelled, making the Medi-witch step even further back as she cowered in fear. The control he had over her felt good and he sneered. "Do you even know who I am? I am Draco Malfoy! The son of Lucius Malfoy!"

The Medi-witch proceeded to shock Draco by then appearing ten times as frightened as she had been and tearing out the door like a firebolt. Was it truly that scary to be spoken to by a Malfoy? It made him feel _really _good.

"Mr Malfoy?"

Draco raised an eyebrow as another Medi-witch, the one he assumed was Professor Helbert, appeared in the doorway.

"Come to give me my wand, have you?" he asked.

"I will not have you bullying any of the Medical staff here at St Mungo's." Professor Helbert said, ignoring his question and getting straight down to business instead.

"I wasn't bullying anyone." Draco said, his face darkening.

It was Helbert's turn to raise an eyebrow. "Well Mr Malfoy, I regret to inform you that I must keep your wand confiscated until I am entirely sure that you have fully recovered."

"You can't do that!" Draco began to complain.

"I can and I am doing it, Mr Malfoy. Please don't go anywhere while I fetch the needed equipment to wash your hand of the blood." Helbert turned for the door.

"Give me my wand and I can do it myself."

"I'll be back with you in a moment, Mr Malfoy."

Then she was gone and, to Draco's dismay, she had locked the door.

He was trapped in a hospital room at St Mungo's with no wand and Hermione – _Granger_ for goodness sake, why couldn't he just make himself think of her as Granger again? - wasn't about to come help him since she now thought he couldn't remember anything that had happened between them.

Not that he cared about the last point. And not that it hurt him at all that she had even wiped his memory in the first place, because it _didn't_. At _all_.

And he certainly didn't want her to come rescue him.

Slamming his fist against the wall, clenching his teeth together tightly and dropping his head down, Draco tried not to think about what he had gotten himself into and the situation he had left his parents in when he had fled the Manor.

Stupid Granger. It was all her fault.

Sitting back down on the bed, Draco reluctantly hoped Professor Helbert would come back quickly. The curse must have still been affecting him because he felt as though he was going to throw up any second and he just wanted his hand to be cleaned so he could get some sleep. He hadn't noticed it before but now that he had a moment to himself he realise he felt incredibly tired.

* * *

She hadn't moved. Her eyes were staring blankly in the direction he had been taken and she wasn't paying any attention to Harry's hand on her arm.

How could Draco not remember anything? He had called her Hermione... but then he went back to calling her Granger. The worst thing was that she had been so excited for a moment, thinking that he remembered her and they might be able to get together again... but now _this_. Her hopes were dashed as quickly as they had come and although she had known what would happen when she first wiped his memory, it was unbearable having to go through it again.

"We should go back-"

"No." Hermione shook her head weakly. "They'll only ask questions."

"Are you running to him or leaving, then?" Harry asked darkly. Hermione was still staring but finally managed to tear her eyes away to look up at him sadly.

"I can't stay. If he doesn't remember... I need to keep away from him." Hermione stepped away from Harry and gently pulled her arm from his grip.

"He looked really confused when you called him Draco before. If you simply disappear won't he be even more curious as to why you cared at all for his well-being?" Harry pointed out. "He'll never leave you alone until he discovers the reason."

Hermione swallowed nervously and unconsciously fiddled with her fingers for a moment as her mind turned the information over slowly.

"If he asks, we'll just deny it. Make him think he was dreaming." She looked up at Harry and for the first time he saw how truly sad she was. "Can you do that for me?"

"I don't know if anyone else will agree." Harry said hesitantly. "You do realise there were a lot of onlookers?"

A shaky breath escaped Hermione's lips and she covered her eyes with a hand, lowering her head. "Harry I'm sorry... please just... I can't-"

Without finishing or waiting for another response, she hurried outside as quickly as she could. Harry stayed where he was for a few moments before heading back to the room with Bill and the other Weasley's, dodging their questions about Hermione. He was shocked to the core; he'd never seen her so upset before and it was because of _Malfoy_!

It was now his job to find out how the blond had managed to convince Hermione that he wasn't entirely evil.


	11. Chapter 11

A/N: Hey, just a quick note to say sorry for not updating in so long. I admit I lost some of my inspiration for this story... BUT IT IS BACK! IN FULL FORCE! AND I AM SO EXCITED FOR THE DEATHLY HALLOWS! AND ahem you should read now =]

* * *

With trembling fingers that he tried to hide by shoving his hands into his pockets, Draco left the room he had been kept in at St Mungo's and headed down the corridor. Now that he had fully recovered he had been given his wand and told he could leave. At first he was eager to get out of the hospital so that he wouldn't risk having to see Granger again, but now...

Now he remembered that he had nowhere to go. The Manor was overrun by Death Eaters who probably had orders to kill him on sight. What was even worse than that was that the Dark Lord himself wanted to kill him, now!

Hesitating, Draco glanced around where he had found himself. He recognised the area as a small waiting room which he had been to in the past to visit sick relatives and guessed that this was where he had apparated into the previous day.

That meant Granger was probably somewhere near.

He meant to leave right away and put everything behind him, but he stayed where he was for more than one reason. Not only did he have an intense desire to track down Granger and ask her what she was playing at, but since he had nowhere to go St Mungo's didn't seem quite as threatening any more. And where he stood now... this was where she had fallen to his side and screamed for him to fight whatever was poisoning his body. She had been crying.

He waited too long.

"Malfoy."

Turning around, he clenched his fists as he saw Potter approaching with caution. The boy's glasses were skewed slightly on his face and they made him look comedic, but Draco couldn't find the will to laugh.

"Potter," he said instead.

"That was one heck of an injury you came in here with," Potter said calmly, stopping a few paces away from Draco and folding his arms. "How'd you get it?"

"Why do you care?" Draco snapped. It wasn't a secret that Potter hated him for a lot of different reasons. The latest, of course, was for 'brainwashing' Hermi-Granger into liking him. But, he reminded himself, he had to pretend he didn't remember that.

"I don't," Potter said easily, and for the first time Draco wondered if Granger had sent her friend to find out if he was okay.

"Then if you don't mind," Draco sighed. "I'll be going."

He turned and would have left if Potter wasn't so incredibly _stubborn_! Without missing a beat he reached forward and grabbed Draco's arm to pull him back around, this time glaring at him angrily.

"You're not going anywhere," he growled.

"Not while you're clinging to me, no," Draco pointed out with a scoff.

"What are you playing at?" Potter demanded, letting go of Draco's arm but not letting up on his glare.

"I don't know what you mean," Draco said with a slight frown. "You think I actually want to stay here any longer than I have to?"

"No," Potter shook his head. "But it's obvious someone powerful gave you that injury. If my guess is correct, I'd say you have nowhere to go now."

Draco was silent for a moment as he stared at Potter. Hearing someone else say it made him angry but he forced himself to think before speaking. He had to be careful that he didn't slip up while ranting and say something that proved he remembered all that had happened.

"I'm a bit confused," Draco commented slyly, folding his arms. "You still sound worried about me and yet choose to deny it. Understandable, of course, that you wouldn't want anyone to know you _cared_ about me."

"I'm not the one that cares about you," Potter shot back quickly, before looking away and appearing angry at himself for a moment.

"On the subject," Draco continued. "Why exactly was Granger blabbering like a baby when I first got here?"

Potter's eyes turned back to his and narrowed slightly, although Draco couldn't quite figure out what emotion they were showing.

"What are you talking about?" Potter asked.

"Granger," Draco said with an exasperated sigh. "Your friend? The bookworm? I want to know why she was crying over me."

The lack of immediate response along with the slight drawing-in of the eyebrows made Draco's heart-rate speed up as he wondered why on earth Potter was now looking even more confused than before.

"She was never crying over you," Potter spoke. "What are you _talking_ about?"

Draco froze up. She hadn't been crying over him? Why not? No... why did it matter? It _did_ matter, he knew that much. And after only a moment longer he could say why. If she hadn't been crying over him then he must have dreamed it. Imagined it all.

He really was pathetic, wasn't he? Thinking that after everything that had happened she would come to him when he needed her? She wasn't worth it. She had wiped his memory and left him – for good. There was no return.

She wasn't going to come back to him.

But now he didn't know what to say to Potter, who was still standing there and now had one eyebrow raised as if in a challenge. How had they even managed to have a fairly calm conversation, anyway? Shouldn't they have been screaming at each other?

But of course. Potter would have known what Hermione did and was probably so happy with her decision that he had come to rub it in his face that now he had no one. Nothing. Nowhere to go.

A whimper escaped Draco's lips and he hurriedly turned away, putting his back to Potter to try and block him out. He didn't want anyone to see him like this. Why was he even falling apart? It wasn't like she'd meant that much to him in the first place.

He had played her, hadn't he?

No.

He had fought her at first, but then he had fallen for her. Against all odds he had come to see her not as a mudblood but as a human being. Someone who cared for him and had tried so hard to break through his barriers in the beginning. Someone who had succeeded in the end. Someone who he had told things – things he shouldn't have told anyone. Someone who he had... loved.

He loved her. And as soon as he told her that she wiped his memory. Was she afraid that he didn't mean it? Was she afraid that he _did_ mean it? Or did she just truly think that wiping his memory was the only way to save him?

None of it mattered! Why was he wasting his time thinking all these things over when it made no difference because she _wasn't coming back?_

"Malfoy," Potter interrupted his thoughts, slowly walking around to face him again. Draco noticed that Potter's eyes were wide as they studied him and he felt one momentary spark of pride that he'd surprised the boy, but it was extinguished in embarrassment.

"Leave me alone," Draco snarled, ducking his head to hide the moisture in his eyes.

"Malfoy," Potter repeated. "I lied."

Lied about what? Draco didn't understand the significance of what he was being told and just wanted to be left alone so that he could figure everything out for himself. Why didn't Potter understand that?

"She _was_ crying over you," the other boy continued. "But she didn't want you to know. She thought you still couldn't remember. But... you can, can't you?"

_She _was_ crying over you._

Hermione had been there? He hadn't imagined it? It had been real?

Draco ran a hand through his hair to try and distract himself, looking away from Potter and doing his best to keep his emotions in check. He couldn't afford to let Potter know just how weak he felt right now.

"Why... why was she crying over me?" Draco managed softly, refusing to answer Potter's question.

"Why do you think?" Potter asked, angry once again. "Stop pretending, alright? She was crying over you because she _loves_ you! Don't you get it? And since you remember... I don't understand why you would even _want_ to pretend that you don't."

Draco didn't know what to say. Potter was right.

"Do you have any idea what you've done to her? How much you've _hurt_ her?" Potter continued, stepping closer to Draco. "She loves you and it tore her in half to have to wipe your memory the first time! When she saw you here... she thought Voldemort-" Draco flinched. "-had gotten the memories out of you so you remembered again. She thought she had another chance to be with you, but then you went ahead and pretended you couldn't remember a thing!"

Potter finished his rant and breathed heavily, stepping back again and folding his arms. He was still glaring angrily and Draco wished he would stop.

Truly, though, why _was_ he pretending not to remember when he had known it would hurt her?

"I'm sorry."

He surprised himself. No wonder Potter gasped and dropped his arms to his sides.

"I'm sorry for being stupid and foolish. I'm sorry for being... selfish. Do you know where she is?" Draco asked, his voice taking on a desperate lilt towards the end.

Potter took a moment to reply. Obviously he had been expecting a lot more opposition on Draco's part and didn't know what to do now that he had gotten what he wanted so quickly.

"She's probably..." Potter trailed off and frowned. "Do you want me to get her for you?"

"If you would," Draco said softly, hopefully.

Potter nodded slowly and then reached for his wand, waiting a moment longer before apparating out of the room and leaving Draco by himself.

Draco moved over to one of the chairs in the waiting room and sat down, putting his head in his hands. What was he going to say when he saw her again? How was he going to be able to apologise for hurting her so badly?

Did he even need to apologise? Surely, it was _her_ that needed to apologise! She had weakened him down enough to finally admit how much he cared and then wiped his memory as if none of it mattered! She was the selfish one! She was the one that didn't care. She was-

_Crack_.

-standing right in front of him.


	12. Chapter 12

A/N: I told you I had my inspiration for this story back! I hope you enjoy this chapter and leave a lovely review =]

* * *

Hermione hurriedly smoothed down her clothes and hair, feeling nervous as she looked down at where Draco sat on a chair. His eyes were wide as he looked up at her and she wondered whether it had been a good idea to come, after all. To be honest, she hadn't thought about it very much when Harry had told her. Instead, she had been far too thrilled to wait and had come by herself so that she would get there quicker.

"Hello," she said awkwardly.

Draco stood up, now looking down at her since he was taller. He swallowed but didn't speak, his hands clenched into fists by his sides. Hermione wished she could know what was going through his head but was happy to wait for him to reveal things to her if she had to.

"Harry said you remembered."

The statement was said casually, although the fear behind it was plain. There was still a possibility that Draco had lied simply to find out what was going on with his enemies and couldn't actually remember anything at all. Hermione was clinging to the hope that he had finally decided to tell the truth.

"I do," Draco sighed.

"...But?" Hermione asked quietly, quite clearly hearing the hesitance in Draco's voice. Something was bothering him.

Draco looked away for a moment and frowned slightly, showing Hermione that he wasn't sure where to begin with what he had to say. A second _crack_ interrupted them momentarily as Harry also appeared in the waiting room, but as they turned to look at him awkwardly he raised his hands in a surrender and slowly walked away, around the corner and out of sight.

Draco sighed.

"It took me so long to admit..." Draco swallowed and still avoided her eyes. "To admit that I loved you. And then you wiped my memory."

Hermione's mouth fell open in shock as she realised what was the main thing that had been bothering him this whole time. He probably thought she had wiped his memory because of what he had said!

"You've got it all wrong!" she said quickly. "I only wiped your memory because I knew you had to go back for your parents. I thought if I wiped your memory it would protect you..."

Draco looked down at her, understanding in his eyes that filled her with a sense of relief. But not everything had been discussed yet and she still needed to know something before she could be entirely relieved.

"Draco," she murmured. "About what you admitted..."

"I meant it."

She gasped and her eyes widened slightly as she stared up at him. He sounded so sincere and honest! It was surprising to hear him speak about something like that so easily and firmly, without hesitation.

"But you said... you said that it was all pretend. You said you were just-"

"I have a bad habit of lying when I'm scared to face the truth," Draco interrupted quickly. "The thing is... for a while I was convinced that the best thing to do was make you think I had never liked you in the first place so that you would leave me. I knew I wasn't... I wasn't strong enough to leave you for myself, but I was scared about staying with you. I mean, being with you goes against everything I've ever been taught!"

Draco let out a deep breath and sat down again, putting his head in his hands. Hermione was shocked at what he'd just said and couldn't really comprehend it.

"I'm always going to be here for you, Draco," Hermione said softly, stepping over to sit on the chair beside him. "As long as you want me."

There was a moment as neither of them spoke and Hermione bit her lip anxiously. She could tell that there was still a lot going through his head and didn't want to rush him, but she was incredibly worried about losing him again. What if his fears won out?

"All those times I tried to stop you from saying you loved me," he murmured. "All those times I wouldn't say it back to you. I couldn't admit it. You're a mud- a muggle born. For goodness sake, what's wrong with me?"

"Nothing's wrong with you," Hermione said quickly. "Being taught the things you were when you grew up, it's only natural that you tried to fight against falling for me! That doesn't matter any more though, does it? We're here now. You've told me how you feel and... and you do want to be with me, right?"

Draco flinched slightly at her words and turned his face away. She couldn't believe it. He still wasn't brave enough.

"Why do you keep coming back to me?" he asked after a while. The question surprised her and she frowned.

"What do you mean?"

"After I lied to you, hurt you and tried to get rid of you, why on earth do you keep helping me? I don't-" Draco had turned back to her, staring intensely, but now his gaze faltered again. His uncertainty pulled at Hermione's heart and she wanted to pull him into her arms and never let him go again. "I don't understand why you haven't given up on me yet."

"Draco..." Hermione breathed out. How could she ever put into words the effect he had had on her during their time together? It had started as a simple desire to help bring him over to the light, but she had fallen along the way as she saw another side to him. At first she didn't think he'd ever see her as more than a friend, but even then he managed to surprise her and sweep her off her feet again. After all that, not even his lies could stop her from wanting him to have a happily-ever-after. In the Malfoy Manor when she had believed she was going to die and Draco had never really loved her, she couldn't help loving him. They'd been through too much for her to ever be able to simply let go of him and move on with her life.

How could she possibly even _attempt_ to say that aloud?

Just before she had a chance to try and respond, Draco stood and ran a hand through his hair nervously. Slowly, Hermione also stood up, watching his back carefully as he faced away from her.

"I..." his voice shook as he spoke the single word and Hermione took a step towards him, gently putting a hand on his shoulder which he hurriedly shook off. "I brought about Dumbledore's death. I brought Death Eaters into the castle." Spinning around, his eyes bore into her own and she was shocked to see the tears streaming down his face. "I'm the reason Bill Weasley is the way he is, now! It's all my fault! I did this!"

Gasping, Hermione didn't think as she rushed forwards and threw her arms around him, hugging him tightly to let him know he wasn't alone.

"I don't blame you, Draco," she murmured as he slowly returned the hug, his body shaking and tears coming steadily. "You had no choice! He was going to kill your family."

It wasn't long before Draco collapsed to his knees, bringing Hermione with him. She didn't seem to care and simply continued to hold on to him, her own tears slipping out now as she shared in his pain.

"We can make it through this," she promised quietly. "I can take you to the Order and they'll keep you safe."

"You'll _never_ convince them-" Draco began to object, but Hermione pulled back from the hug quickly to stare into his eyes firmly. His words died in his throat, although the main reason was because he had suddenly realised he wasn't the only one crying.

"Everyone deserves a second chance," Hermione said. "They know that."

"You already gave me mine," Draco muttered, looking down in shame. "I blew it."

"No you didn't," Hermione said earnestly. "You never accepted it from me in the first place. That means you can still take it."

Draco turned his face further away from her and awkwardly wiped his hand over his eyes, trying to get rid of his tears. He still didn't look too sure of her idea, but she didn't know what else to tell him! If only he would just _trust_ her!

"Draco," she said, gently touching his chin with her fingers to turn his face back to hers. "Do you remember when... when I told you a long time ago that you would have to fight alone?"

Draco gulped and nodded.

"That was a lie," she whispered. "You'll never have to fight alone as long as I can help it. Do you trust me?"

Pain showed through Draco's eyes and he tried to turn away again but she tightened her grip on his chin and leant closer. They were now practically breathing into each others mouths but neither one showed any discomfort. They hadn't been this close to each other in a while.

"Do you trust me?" Hermione repeated, still whispering.

Five seconds passed, then ten.

A shuddering sigh suddenly left his lips and he closed his eyes, leaning further forward just enough so that their foreheads were touching. Hermione closed her eyes also and let go of his chin, finding his hand quickly and squeezing tightly.

"Yes."

She wasn't sure who moved in first, but then they were kissing and he had buried his other hand in her hair, gently pulling to tilt her head back so he had easier access to her mouth. After so long of misunderstanding each other and arguing, the kiss felt like pure bliss and tasted even better, despite the salty tears from both of them.

The moment was interrupted by _cracks_ sounding further away in the building and the two of them pulled back to stare, wide-eyed, at each other. They knew the sound of apparition, but why were so many people apparating into St Mungo's all at the one time? The answer came to them at the same time and they hurriedly pulled themselves to their feet, turning just in time to see Harry run around the corner and then stop in front of them.

"Death Eaters," he gasped out. "Here in St Mungo's. They're looking for Malfoy."


	13. Chapter 13

A/N: I am SO EPICALLY SORRY for the long gap between the last chapter and this one! I've had incredibly bad writers block not only for this story but for ALL of my stories! Hopefully, since I've found the inspiration to write this chapter, I will also soon find inspiration for all my stories once again, but I dunno... inspiration comes and goes.

Something interesting I noticed the other day was that I cut 'In the Library' chapter 7 into two parts. This amused me because Harry Potter 7 is in two parts now. WHO ELSE IS EXCITED FOR THE MOVIE? MEEEEE WHOOOO! I'M WATCHING IT AT 12:15AM WHOOOOO!

Okay sorry. But yeah. Sorry for the delay. Enjoy this chapter. I love Draco. You should too.

* * *

Draco felt a chill run down his spine as he registered Potter's words. Of course the Dark Lord wouldn't have given up on him so easily, and given the fact that Draco had been injured it probably hadn't been difficult at all for the Death Eaters to realise he'd gone to St. Mungo's.

"Come on," Hermione said hurriedly, grabbing his hand and pulling him out into a corridor, away from the sounds of screams that had started up in the distance. Clearly the Death Eaters were ruthlessly trying to find him.

His mind went numb as they ran. He could picture them in his mind, grabbing Medi-witches and demanding to know where he was. They would be flooding down corridors and into rooms, searching every inch of the building. It wouldn't be long now.

"Harry, you've got to help me!" Hermione called across to Potter, the desperation clear in her voice. Draco had almost forgotten that the other boy was running with them as well. "I've got to convince them that he's on our side and I can only do that with your help!"

Convince who? The Death Eaters? Draco was fairly sure they already knew that, but decided not to point it out.

Potter suddenly ducked down a side corridor and pulled the other two with him, allowing the three of them to pause and rest for a moment. He was staring at Hermione with a thoughtful expression, making Draco wonder if he'd missed something important in what Hermione had said.

"You really think he's worth it?" Potter asked.

"Yes," Hermione said instantly without any hesitation.

"Then yes, I'll help you," Potter sighed in response. "The Death Eaters are already getting close so we'd better leave now."

"What's going on?" Draco spoke up suddenly, realising that he didn't have a clue what they were talking about and feeling incredibly vulnerable.

"We're taking you to the Order," Hermione said to him, squeezing his hand gently and smiling. "Just like I promised."

"The Order?" he repeated dumbly.

"That's right, come on," Potter said, grabbing Hermione's hand and preparing to apparate away. Terrified, Draco ripped his own hand out from Hermione's and stepped away, his heart pounding in his chest.

"No."

"Would you rather we leave you here with the Death Eaters then?" Potter snarled angrily, quickly getting agitated.

"The Order will never accept me!" Draco said, trying to ignore Potter and staring into Hermione's eyes. She watched him sadly, reaching out tentatively for his hand again.

"They will, Draco," she told him. "Harry and I will vouch for you."

"But I-" Draco gulped. "I've got the mark. They'll never believe you. They'll think I brainwashed you somehow."

"It's a risk you're going to have to take," Potter snapped. "Just like the risk I'm taking right now by staying in St Mungo's while it's being overrun by Death Eaters. Don't you think they'd forget about you instantly if they saw me? So let's _go_ before they catch one of us!"

Draco heard the reasoning behind what Potter had said and slowly nodded, allowing Hermione to slip her hand into his again. She was still smiling and it helped ease some of his worry. Surely the Order would believe her? Surely they would believe _Potter_?

In the next moment the three of them were wrenched out of St Mungo's, spinning uncontrollably before they were spat onto the doorstep of a tall building. Potter opened the door and stepped in quickly, then moving aside to give Hermione and Draco room to enter as well. Hermione shut the door behind them all and sighed.

"We made it," she said to Draco. "They won't look for you here and even if they did, they wouldn't be able to find it."

He gripped her hand tightly in a thank you, not sure that he would be able to speak right now if he tried to. He thought briefly of his parents, alone to defend themselves against the Dark Lord, and of how close he had come to being captured and murdered. He owed the Medi-witches at St Mungo's so much for saving his hand.

Swallowing, he opened his mouth to finally try and say something, thinking that she deserved to hear him speak after all she had done for him. "I'm so-"

"Don't move."

Startled, Draco and Hermione both looked up to see who had spoken. Standing a short distance away was Lupin, his wand drawn and pointing at Draco.

"It's okay," Potter said from beside Hermione. "He's on our side."

"He told you that, did he?" Lupin asked sharply.

"No, not once," Potter replied smoothly, shaking his head. "But he's proved it quite a few times."

Draco stood in silence as he watched what was unfolding before him. He had heard Potter agree to help him when they were back in St Mungo's, but to actually see and hear the boy-who-lived sticking up for him? He almost couldn't believe it.

"I'm sorry Harry," Lupin said. "But I can't believe a word you say right now."

"Use veritaserum then," Potter shrugged.

"No!" Draco gasped out, memories and thoughts of him and Hermione tumbling through his mind. He didn't want anyone else to know just how badly he had fallen for her and it would be inevitable if veritaserum was used on him. If anyone other than Hermione found out, they would no doubt use it against him. He would _not_ allow himself to be so exposed before those who had been his enemies his whole life.

Lupin's eyes had arrowed at Draco's cry and Hermione was gazing at him in confusion, wondering why he was so averse to the suggestion.

"Draco, please," she murmured quietly. "If we use veritaserum the Order will _have_ to know you're telling the truth!"

"I... I know but-"

"_Incarcerous_." The word left Lupin's lips swiftly and Draco's sentence was cut off as he found ropes whipping around him and holding him in place. His eyes widened in fear and he heard Hermione cry out, but he knew there was nothing she could do.

He had been expecting this, really. He hadn't known exactly how it would happen but he had known he wouldn't be welcomed with open arms.

"Lupin, I'm telling you, just use veritaserum!" Potter was saying, still clinging to his promise to help out.

"I'm sorry Harry," Lupin replied. "But until I know what he's done to you, you're all going to be in confinement."

Draco closed his eyes to block out Hermione's look of anguish, feeling bad for her but knowing things had to go this way before there was any chance of him being accepted. He still highly doubted it, but there was no way he could escape now and at least he would probably be treated better as an enemy among the Order than as a traitor among Death Eaters.

Feeling his feet suddenly leave the floor, he opened his eyes again so that he could see where he was going as Lupin levitated him down the corridor.

"Come on then," the man said. "Let's find out what you know and how you convinced Harry and Hermione to help you."

_You're in for one heck of a ride_, Draco thought to himself glumly.


	14. Chapter 14

**A/N:** Such an incredibly difficult chapter. It ran away with itself.

And I'm really sorry if a lot of this feels like... unnecessary repeating of already known facts, but I really felt like I needed to put all of it in. =/

Anyway I hope you enjoy it, which you SHOULD because it's out a LOT sooner than I thought it would be. You should leave me a review to say thank you. Oh, and read the message on my profile please :) Thanks x

* * *

Lupin had decided to start off the questioning with Harry, mainly because he was the only one who looked most open to telling the truth at the moment. The more truths he could obtain to begin with, the better.

That was why he stood in the same room with Harry now, the two of them watching each other equally.

"Why did you bring him here? Did he ask for refuge?" Lupin asked.

"No, he didn't ask for anything. Hermione was the one who asked for my help," Harry replied easily.

"What do you mean?"

Harry sighed and scratched the back of his head before continuing. "She was so determined that he was worth saving so she asked me to help bring him to the Order. I trusted her judgement."

Lupin frowned before smoothing out his features again, not wanting Harry to misjudge any of his expressions. He could already see that the boy was beginning to grow impatient with the questions even though they had only just started.

"And how do you think Malfoy got Hermione to trust _him_ so much?" Lupin asked softly.

"I don't have a clue." Harry shook his head with a shrug. "I know he's had plenty of time, though. I'd been suspicious of him all year but whenever I brought it up Hermione would tell me I was being silly. Ron listened to me, but Hermione was distant from both of us. Shortly before... before what happened-" Harry looked pointedly at Lupin now, indicating Dumbledore's death before he went on. "-I found out Hermione had been meeting up with him all year in the library."

"You say you were suspicious," Lupin spoke, drawing particular attention to one part of what Harry had said. "Do you think Malfoy put a spell on her even while you were at school?"

"I don't think he _ever_ put a spell on her," Harry said decisively.

"But you said she was distant from you," Lupin pointed out. "You don't think that could have been the effect of a spell?"

"No." Harry shook his head. "She was distant from me and Ron because she wanted to protect Malfoy."

"From what?"

"From _us_ of course," Harry spat, clenching his teeth together in annoyance. "All those meetings with him during the year meant she had to know he was planning something, and for one reason or another she didn't want us stopping him."

"But you don't know why?" Lupin asked, finding it almost impossible to make any sense out of all the information Harry had given him so far. "She never told you anything?"

"If she _had_ told me, I would tell you. Look, I can only guess that she kept it secret because she was trying to convince him to stop by herself. Maybe she didn't want anyone else interrupting her progress in case they aggravated him into acting sooner, I don't know. All I _do_ know, is that he couldn't do it in the end and it's probably all thanks to Hermione." Harry took a deep breath and closed his eyes for a short moment, trying to calm himself down.

"You're talking about Dumbledore," Lupin murmured.

"I told you before, Malfoy was meant to kill him. But Snape did it instead because Malfoy _couldn't_."

"So now you're saying he hasn't done anything wrong?" Lupin asked with a frown, unable to keep it off his face. It didn't seem like Harry to overlook the truth so blatantly.

"Of _course_ he did something wrong," Harry groaned, dropping his head into his hands. "But everyone makes mistakes and he's sorting himself out now. We don't have anything to fear from him as long as we let Hermione stay with him."

Lupin watched Harry silently for a few moments, taking in everything he had been told and trying to fit it all together in a way that was understandable. He couldn't see a reason why Harry would be lying to him, but that only confirmed what he had thought before. Malfoy had put a spell on Hermione and let her do all the work of convincing Harry for him.

"I'm sure you understand I'm still going to have to check Hermione for spells," he said gently. Harry looked up at him. "I don't think either of them have been entirely honest with you."

* * *

Ron leaned against the wall opposite the room Hermione was being held in, his arms folded and his face dark with disappointment. He didn't understand what had happened to make Hermione bring Malfoy to the Order, but he assumed the blond git had done something horrible to her. Now all he wanted was to know she was alright so he could yell at her for allowing herself to be brainwashed.

He was also reprimanding himself for not doing something sooner, when she first told him she had fallen for the git.

The sound of a door at the end of the hall reached his ears and he turned to look, seeing Lupin step out of a room with Harry behind him. It looked like the first interrogation was over, so Ron walked over to them quickly.

"Well?" he asked.

"Well, what?" Harry asked with a slight frown, picking at the sleeve of his shirt and shifting uncomfortably.

Lupin faced Ron and spoke. "Harry doesn't know enough about the situation and I can find no reason why Malfoy would have felt the need to put a spell on him. It's Hermione we have to worry about now."

"Hermione?" Ron swallowed nervously.

"Malfoy must have done something to her if she trusted him so much she was able to convince Harry to go along with the plan," Lupin explained, rubbing his forehead tiredly. "I'm going to go talk to her now."

"With veritaserum?" Ron asked, noticing the lack of any vials in the man's hands.

"No," Lupin sighed and shook his head. "I want to hear her own answers first and see if I can detect a signature spell in her behaviour."

"I'm hungry," Harry murmured from beside them both, turning and making his way towards the kitchen without waiting for a response.

Ron glanced after him and then back at Lupin, asking, "When will you be interrogating Malfoy? You'll use veritaserum on him, won't you?"

"After I talk to Hermione," Lupin told him. "And yes, I will use veritaserum. His reaction earlier was enough to tell me that he's hiding something and I want to know what it is. Now go on, Harry needs some company."

Ron nodded and made a move to follow after Harry, but Lupin grabbed his arm and cleared his throat quietly before saying, "And Ron? He told me he doesn't think Malfoy's used a spell at all. Don't get me wrong, I'd like to think the best of people as well, but in this situation we need to be realistic. It's highly unlikely that these events have unfolded naturally."

Solemnly, Ron murmured his agreement before walking out to the kitchen to be with his best friend, scuffing his shoes as he went.

Lupin squared his shoulders and walked down the hall.

* * *

Hermione was pacing anxiously within the room she had been confined to, wringing her hands together as she thought of how terrified Draco had looked before when Harry had suggested using veritaserum. What was he afraid of them finding out? Surely he wasn't still hiding any secrets from her?

The door opened and she spun around with a gasp, her eyes taking in Lupin's guarded expression and sharp eyes. He shut the door behind him and remained silent for a few moments.

"Have you spoken to Draco yet?" she asked him.

"No." He shook his head. "I'll be speaking to him last."

Hermione nodded and chewed her lip, wondering what sort of questions she was going to be asked now. Did Lupin think she was the victim in the situation, or did he wonder whether she had a more important role? Did he think she had betrayed the Order for Draco? Did he even know that she had fallen in love?

Did she _want _him to know?

"What did Malfoy say to make you bring him here?" Came the first question, and Lupin stepped further into the room, watching her closely so that he could gauge her reactions better.

Hermione lifted her chin slightly and replied with the truth, believing that there was no reason to do otherwise. Draco was not in the wrong. "Nothing. It was my idea."

"Your idea to bring a Death Eater into the midst of the Order?" Lupin pressed on, eyes narrowing.

"He wasn't a Death Eater by choice!" Hermione said firmly. "He was forced to become one because You-Know-Who threatened to kill him and his family. He didn't want any part of it." _Please, _she thought to herself desperately,_ believe me._

"Okay," Lupin nodded acceptingly. "We'll leave that subject for now as I'd like to speak to Malfoy and hear his side of the story." Folding his arms and walking around the room slowly, he considered his next words carefully. Hermione watched in anticipation, feeling her palms becoming sweaty and trying to discretely wipe them on her clothes. It wouldn't help the situation if Lupin knew how nervous she was. "So it was your idea to bring him here, and he agreed?"

"Not at first," Hermione breathed out slowly, glad that the question was a fairly easy one. "He didn't want to come at all because he was afraid you'd never believe him and he'd be held prisoner. But I couldn't just leave him when he was being chased by Death Eaters!"

"So how _did_ you convince him to come?" Lupin tilted his head to the side, his eyes boring into Hermione's and trying to see any indication that she was either lying or not entirely there. If she wasn't affected by a spell then he could see no reason why she would be lying, but he also couldn't see how Malfoy had persuaded her to trust him in the first place without some sort of magical aid. If only there was a tell-tale sign of a spell that had been used on her.

Of course, everything would be much simpler if it really was as Harry said and the only plan Malfoy ever had was the one involving Dumbledore. Maybe Harry was right and the only reason Hermione had ever gotten involved was so that she could stop something dreadful from happening.

"I promised I'd do everything I could to prove he was on our side," Hermione shrugged. "And once Harry did the same-"

"Harry?" Lupin frowned.

"Yes, Harry did the same because he could see how much it meant to me," Hermione explained. "So once we told Draco he agreed to come, placing his life in our hands. Don't you see? He's on our side now. It's so obvious."

"So tell me," Lupin said slowly. "What made you get involved with helping Malfoy in the first place? Did he say anything to you? Try and manipulate you?"

Hermione's eyes widened and she shook her head quickly. "You're mistaken, he wasn't the one who instigated it."

"_You_ did?" Lupin asked in confusion. "Why? I thought you, Harry and Ron hated him."

"We did," Hermione acknowledged with a small nod. "But I- I got involved when I saw him... crying." She had hesitated, not wanting to say that Draco had been crying because she was sure it would embarrass him, but she also knew she couldn't hide it at a time like this. The more Lupin knew the better. "The idea of being able to save him got stuck in my head, so I latched myself onto him. I offered my help and eventually he took it when he was sure I wouldn't tell anyone."

"So you helped him because you pitied him?" Lupin asked.

Hermione frowned slightly but nodded. "Yes."

"And you brought him here to the Order so he could have protection because you still pity him? You think he still needs 'saving' from You-Know-Who?"

Hermione's eyes flashed suddenly and she stared at Lupin, wondering if he knew what he was about to make her admit. His curiously open expression suggested that he didn't, but Hermione couldn't go back now.

"I no longer pity him," she said seriously. "I haven't for a long time."

"What, then?"

Closing her eyes and praying that this would not alter the way Lupin had been beginning to see the situation, Hermione said, "I love him."


	15. Chapter 15

A/N: =O UPDATED SO SOOOOON!

I just want to quickly point out that there were only 16 chapters of ItL... ;)

Haha I bet you're all now wondering what the subliminal message in that is.

I just put another subliminal message in that is completely unrelated. No one will get it. Except my bestie Mxya.

Sorry rambling now, go forth young one~

* * *

Draco's hands were tied firmly behind his back, cutting off some circulation and causing him to squirm in discomfort every now and again. The chair he was sitting on had been turned to face the door and as Draco looked up, Lupin opened it to step through. Shutting it and folding his arms, he glared down at Draco sternly.

After a few moments, Draco dropped his gaze.

"I've heard a lot about what you've been doing this year," Lupin said slowly, taking a step forward so that he could look down from a greater height and further intimidate the boy. "Harry especially had a lot to say about you."

Clenching his hands into fists behind his back, Draco kept his mouth shut. He knew that speaking too soon would not make Lupin impressed, so he had to wait for the right moment. Besides, he was trying to prove he was on their side, so he needed to go along with whatever was suggested. Even if he didn't like the idea.

_Especially_ if he didn't like the idea.

"I'm sure you will understand that I must use Veritaserum when questioning you," Lupin continued. "I have reason to believe you're hiding something and if you continue to resist you will only be strengthening these suspicions."

Draco breathed out through his nose slowly before nodding once.

"It's good to see you're in an agreeable mood," Lupin commented, reaching into his pocket and drawing out a small vial of Veritaserum. "If you could tilt your head back and open your mouth?"

Gritting his teeth together in defiance momentarily, Draco then pushed his pride away as forcefully as he could and did as he had been told. He felt as though the man was trying to humiliate him, but there was nothing he could do about it at the moment. The easier he complied with what was asked of him, the sooner this questioning process would be over.

Lupin stepped forward, reaching out with the vial to tip three drops of Veritaserum into Draco's mouth before stepping back again and watching as the boy swallowed it down. Not waiting any longer, he opened his mouth to ask the first question.

"Were you blackmailed into becoming a Death Eater against your will?" he asked sharply, catching Draco off guard with the sudden change of tone.

"Yes," came the answer from his mouth, tumbling out before he had even been able to think about responding. A cold fear settled over him and he tried to calm his mind, but it was already dreaming up possible questions that Lupin could ask about Hermione. The thought of anyone other than her knowing just how deeply he felt still frightened him.

"Did You-Know-Who threaten to kill you and your family if you did not become a Death Eater and attempt to carry out the task you were given of murdering Albus Dumbledore?" Lupin asked.

His eyes widening in surprise of how much Lupin knew, Draco's mouth again answered for him. "Yes, he did."

"And you did not want to be a Death Eater?" Lupin asked.

"No, I did not," Draco replied.

"But once you had the task, you enlisted the help of Hermione Granger?" Lupin clearly wasn't leaving any time between questions for Draco to try and gather his thoughts properly. It was always possible that the effects of Veritaserum could be countered if someone knew how to and had enough strength.

"Yes, but only after she approached me first," Draco said.

"And why did she help you?"

It sounded like an innocent question from the way Lupin asked it, but Draco's eyes hardened immediately. Still, there was nothing, to his knowledge, that he could do to stop himself from answering.

"She saw me weakened," he began. "She wanted to help me because I was under stress and couldn't handle what was happening. She persisted until I finally let her in and then she stayed because-" There was a pause and a guttural sound as Draco closed his eyes for a moment. He felt like he was choking on his tongue. "-she fell in love with me."

"And then you hurt her," Lupin murmured.

"Yes." Draco cursed the word and looked pleadingly up at Lupin, begging for him to understand. He didn't trust himself to open his mouth and try and explain, fearing that he would pour out even more secrets if he tried to do that.

"Did you put a spell on her?" Lupin asked then, narrowing his eyes and watching Draco's reactions closely. He was so sure – so sure that he was about to discover the truth of what had happened. Then all he would need to do was ask which spell and if Draco knew of a way to reverse it.

"No!" Draco exclaimed, his eyes wide in shock that Lupin had suggested such a thing. Surely the man didn't have such a low opinion of him? Especially after hearing that he hadn't even wanted to be a Death Eater in the first place!

Frowning in annoyance, Lupin paused a moment to rethink the situation. So Draco _hadn't_ used a spell, just like Harry had thought, but already Lupin was forming new ideas of how the events had come to pass. He took a breath and quickly prepared himself for the next onslaught of question he wanted to ask, wanting to ask them as quickly as possible to stop Draco forming coherent thoughts.

"Have you manipulated her?" Lupin snapped out.

"Y-yes," Draco said, swallowing nervously. This was not looking good.

"Have you threatened her?" Another question, snapped out quickly after receiving an answer.

"Yes, I have."

"Have you lied to her?"

"Yes, but-"

"Have you forced her to do things she didn't want to do?"

"Yes!"

"And did you take advantage of her feelings for you?"

"...Yes, alright? But you don't understand! It's true I did all those things to her, but that was before I-"

The door slammed shut before Draco was able to finish and he seethed, glaring at it as if his gaze could somehow bring Lupin back into the room so he could explain. Lupin had started leaving as soon as the yes escaped Draco's lips, obviously having heard enough to be satisfied. But he hadn't even heard the whole story!

Frowning, Draco wondered what Hermione had told him. She had promised to help, but now that they were separated how was he to know she was keeping that promise?

Draco tried to be angry with her. He closed his eyes and willed the familiar feeling to come forward, but nothing happened. He was so exhausted from everything that had occurred over the past few days that he couldn't bring himself to be angry. And Hermione had looked so sincere when she told him she would help.

Sighing, he wondered how she was coping. What was she doing right now? Sitting somewhere with Ron and Harry, listening to Lupin convict him? Was she talking back heatedly, trying to convince them of his innocence still? Perhaps she wasn't with them at all. Maybe she was with some other Order members, trying to spread the word around that he was not a threat to them.

He had no idea that she was actually in the room right next to his, sitting against the wall and blinking back tears.


	16. Chapter 16

I thought I might amuse you by showing you my original author notes, then showing you the REAL author notes (riiiiight at the bottom of the chapter). So um, yeah, here's the author notes I wrote before I'd actually finished this chapter:

_A/N: So I've decided not to be a poopy-pants by ending the story with this chapter. So yes, folks, there will be more than just this one. Yaaaaaaaay more opportunities for me to leave you in the lurch for months at a time! Haha just kidding... :/_

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Keeping her head down, Hermione tried not to let on that she was angry with what was happening. Lupin had let her out of the room she had been in, taking her to another room where Ron and Harry were before proceeding to tell them what he had found out from questioning Draco.

"I need you to tell us everything, Hermione," Lupin said to her, watching her closely. There was pity in his eyes, one more reason why she didn't want to meet them with her own. She couldn't stand having them all believe that Draco was in the wrong. The way Lupin had said everything made it sound like- like Draco hadn't changed. Like he was still the same boy who she had first tried to help.

"Hermione?" Ron asked gently, touching her arm only to have her flinch away violently.

"You've got it all wrong," she snapped at him, eyebrows narrowed angrily. "All of you, you're so eager to believe the worst of him!"

"Didn't you hear what I just said, Hermione?" Lupin asked. "He admitted to lying, manipulating and using you for his own purposes. He deliberately made you fall for him so that you would be blinded as you are now. You have to see past your feelings for him and realise the truth!"

"But he loves me too!" Hermione retorted, finally turning to look him in the eyes and trying to send all of the hate she possibly could across to him. "He lied and manipulated me at first, but then he fell in love with me!"

"And how do you know that wasn't just another one of his lies?" Lupin asked.

"Because," Harry suddenly spoke up, making the other three look over at him in surprise. "He said he was sorry, and I've never seen him look so upset than he did when he was at St. Mungo's."

"What do you mean?" Lupin frowned slightly and folded his arms.

"I spoke to him at St. Mungo's," Harry explained with a sigh. "Hermione wanted me to pretend she hadn't been there in case he asked because it would just cause problems – since she thought he couldn't remember anything that had happened after she erased his memory. He did ask, and when I told him what she wanted me to he got really upset. It was clear to me that he'd changed and he really did love her. I can't explain it, but isn't it obvious? There were no spells involved so stop accusing him. Hermione's right. He's on our side now."

Lupin stared at Harry curiously for a while but then slowly began to nod.

"I didn't want to believe it at first," he admitted with a sigh, leaning back in his chair. "But since there were no spells used I have to. I'm sorry that I was ready to believe the worst, Hermione, but he _is_ a Death Eater after all."

"So you'll take him out of confinement?" Hermione asked eagerly, eyes lighting up slightly. She was clamping down on her excitement as hard as she could in case the answer was no. She didn't want to get her hopes up even though it was too late for that.

Lupin watched her silently for a moment before giving her a half smile. "Yes, I'll take him out of confinement. I'm going to trust that everything you've said is the truth and that he has actually changed, but I will still be keeping a close eye on him to make sure he isn't about to turn on us all and go back to You-Know-Who."

"Oh, thank you!" Hermione gasped out, flinging herself across to him and hugging him tightly. "Thank you, Lupin, thank you!"

Laughing as he hugged her back, Lupin then pushed her away so that he could walk down the corridor to where Draco was still locked up in the room. Hermione trailed closely behind the werewolf, unable to keep the smile from her face and trying to look past him as the man began working on the enchantments.

When the door was open, Lupin held a hand to Hermione to make her wait before entering the room first.

Draco looked up, his expression hollow. From where he sat, he was unable to see Hermione's bouncy form.

"I've spoken with Harry and Hermione," Lupin began explaining. "And they have convinced me that you are telling the truth. You're going to be released from confinement and allowed to move about within our headquarters as you wish, but I will be keeping a close eye on you to make sure that everything I have been told _is_ true."

It took a moment for the words to sink in and Draco frowned as he pushed himself up off the floor.

"That's it?" he asked.

Lupin nodded.

"Draco!"

Giving up on trying to force herself to wait, Hermione burst into the room and pushed past Lupin, her arms finding Draco immediately and pulling him close. He was surprised, but quickly returned the embrace tightly.

"You're amazing, Hermione," he whispered into her hair, a small smile crossing his face as he began to feel a laugh building within him. Looking up briefly, he was pleased to see that Lupin had left and allowed them to have a moment to themselves.

Hermione pulled away, gazing at Draco with a smile before planting a quick kiss on his lips.

"I told you it would be fine," she sighed happily, her hands running up and down his arms as if trying to convince herself that he _was_ right there in front of her and she wasn't just dreaming it up. "And once they see that you're different, they'll believe you even more. But even before then, at least you'll be protected!"

"Did Potter actually help out after all that?" Draco asked curiously, reaching a hand up to brush back some of Hermione's hair from her face. It was so much easier to be affectionate towards her now that she knew the truth. He felt free. And how could he have ever doubted that she would help him? Of _course_ she would!

"Yes." She smiled at him. "I think that's what really made Lupin believe us."

"I really owe him now, don't I?"

"Don't think of it like that," Hermione said quickly. "He believed me and that's why he agreed to help. If anything, _I_ owe him, not you. You never asked him for anything but I did."

Draco rolled his eyes and bent his head down, kissing her again to make sure she didn't say anything else. He felt smug when he heard her sigh happily, leaning her weight against him and trusting him to hold her up.

If only he had been honest with himself sooner. He could have had a lot more of this- this _happiness_. It was amazing.

The sound of someone awkwardly clearing their throat interrupted their moment and they parted so they could look over. Harry was in the doorway, an amused grin on his face as he watched them with his arms folded.

"As great as it is that you're all happy again," Harry said, dropping his arms to his sides and switching to a more serious expression now. "Hermione, Ron still isn't very... _accepting_ of what's happened. I think you should go talk to him – alone – and explain everything you told me. He deserves the truth, don't you agree?"

Hermione looked down, frowning slightly as she knew what Harry said was true. And she _did_ agree with him, but she didn't know whether she would be able to face Ron right now. She's just gotten Draco back again, but now she was being asked to leave him just so that Ron could have some answers? She would probably feel the same if she was in Ron's position, but it still felt unfair.

"Go," Draco murmured, staring down at her. As she looked up at him, he smiled reassuringly. "I'm not going to go anywhere."

"Promise?" she asked him, smiling in return.

"Of course," he laughed.

Taking a deep breath, Hermione nodded. She took hold of his hand quickly, squeezing it before turning and leaving the room past Harry. She assumed Ron had probably gone up to his room and promptly started up the stairs right away. She hoped he'd be able to understand when she explained everything to him, even though it would probably hurt him since he liked her. But what else could she do?

Reaching his room, she gingerly knocked on the door.

"C'm in."

Receiving the invitation, grumbled as it was, Hermione slowly turned the door handle and entered the room, finding Ron instantly. He was lying on his back on his bed, staring up at the roof with a blank expression.

"I thought I'd find you up here," she said softly.

"Surprised you came looking," Ron mumbled. "You got what you wanted. Why don't you and _Malfoy_ just go live happily ever after?"

"Because you're one of my best friends," Hermione said firmly. "I know you don't like him, but he _has_ changed. It will probably take time for you to accept it, but I hope that eventually you will. The thing is, Ron, I love him. I love him so much that I would do anything for him-"

"Then how do we know he's not making you lie for him?" Ron shouted, swinging his legs off the bed so he could sit up and face her, a glare on his face. "You'd do anything? Would you go over to the dark side for him? Would you kill one of us for him? Yeah, Hermione, that's what _anything_ means. In case you need some more help understand it, how about this. _I_ would go over to the dark side for you, Hermione. I would... I would kill to protect you. Do you see? You can't love him, Hermione, you can't honestly tell me you feel that way about him."

Her vision blurring from tears that had suddenly made themselves known, Hermione clenched her hands into fists. The rage Ron felt was clear by his red face, and Hermione couldn't help but feel bad for him because of what he'd just said. Did he really feel that strongly for her?

It also begged the important question: did she feel that strongly for Draco?

"You're unsure, don't you see?" Ron spoke again, standing up and moving over to her, grabbing her shoulders. "You're unsure because you don't."

"Ron..." Hermione began, but had to stop because a sob threatened to escape from her mouth.

"I just don't want you to run headlong into something you're going to regret," Ron said. "And if he _has_ told you to lie for him, then you need to tell us."

"He hasn't!" Hermione snapped, shoving Ron away forcefully. Her uncertainty vanished in an instant and her thoughts were clear. She knew how she felt. "I don't know if I'd go over to the dark side for him, but only because I'm smart enough to realise there are more important things in the world than getting what _I_ want. I would never help Voldemort achieve his goal just so that I could be with Draco. As for... as for killing one of you for him... what kind of situation would call for that to be necessary? But Ron, I know that I do love him. I love him so much that all I can think about is making _him_ happy. I don't care if I have to live my life in misery as long as he doesn't, so stop trying to make me doubt my feelings!"

"Hermione, I didn't-"

"No, Ron, it's time for you to listen."

Before Ron could open his mouth to interrupt again, Hermione began explaining right from the beginning how she and Draco had first come to be acquaintances. From that, she explained their tense friendship and eventually the feelings that had blossomed. Recounting it all brought more tears to her eyes as she had to explain how Draco had lied and hurt her, but she was smiling through it all.

No matter what had happened in the past, she was now sure that Draco loved her. He had left his family, his house and everything he believed in just to be with her. He'd given up everything despite the fear she knew he still felt – for good reason, considering how much he had angered Voldemort – and placed his life in her hands, trusting that she and the Order would be able to keep him safe.

"In my opinion," Hermione said with a sigh. "Draco's risked a lot more than I have."

Ron stared at her silently, not knowing what to say.

"Anyway, now you know. I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner, but I felt that you would ruin everything if you cornered Draco and told him to leave me alone. I couldn't have that happen."

Hermione watched Ron nervously for any sort of reaction, but he continued to stand motionless in front of her.

"I don't expect you to accept it all right away, but you needed to know the truth," Hermione said quietly, looking down and trying not to let the sadness she now felt engulf her. She didn't want to lose Ron's friendship, but she felt that things would never be the same now.

Turning, she began to make her way to the door so she could leave Ron to his own thoughts. Maybe then he'd be able to come to terms with everything better, without anyone watching him and waiting for an immediate reaction that-

"Wait, Hermione," Ron said, stepping towards her but not reaching out. She quickly turned back, eyes wide hopefully. "I still don't like the git," Ron said slowly, frowning. "But I guess... I understand what you're saying. And if you really do love him, then I'm not going to stand in your way."

The words sounded far too good to be true, but Hermione didn't care as she rushed towards her best friend and hugged him tightly.

"Thank you, Ron! I really am _so_ sorry that... that I can't return your feelings. But I do still want to be your friend, believe me."

"Alright, alright," Ron chuckled dryly, hugging her back before pushing her away gently. "Just, you know, give me some time to come to terms with it."

"Of course," Hermione nodded with a smile.

"Now, I know you want to, so go on and get back downstairs."

Hermione smiled even wider at Ron, silently thanking him, before she turned and hurried back down. Draco was waiting for her in the kitchen, leaning against the table while Harry helped himself to some food.

"How'd it go?" Draco asked, grabbing her hand as she walked over to him.

"Better than I'd hoped, in the end," Hermione smiled.

"That's great," Harry said, moving over to the two of them. "He looked pretty upset before. I'm glad you were able to talk him around."

"It's still going to be difficult," Hermione said with a shrug. "He can't exactly turn off his feelings for me. But he's said he won't try and get in our way now. I didn't expect him to be so agreeable this soon."

"You can be very persuasive," Draco said, leaning close to her to press his forehead against the side of her head. She smiled and gripped his hand tighter, thankful for his support. It was amazing to think that they had gone through so much and survived.

Draco closed his eyes and breathed in through his nose, taking in the scent of Hermione and allowing it to help him relax. No matter how hard it was going to be adapting to a new life amongst the Order and dealing with people constantly watching him, he was sure he would be able to do it as long as Hermione was with him.

"I'm sorry for lying," he whispered to her. Then, summoning more courage, he continued, "I love you, Hermione. I really love you."

She twisted against him, looking up into his eyes and gently caressing his hand with her thumb.

"I know, Draco," she replied. "I love you too."

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Now, um, here's the real author notes?

A/N: As the author who finds it difficult to be completely satisfied with anything she writes, I dislike this ending. Anyway.

I hope you've enjoyed reading my story as much as- no, MORE than I've enjoyed writing it. Not to say I haven't had fun, but it has been a bit of a chore finding the inspiration to keep going when all I want to do is start on the other new Dramione ideas I've had.

Oh, what's that, you ask? New ideas? Yes. And I've had so much self control that I haven't even begun writing them yet even though I came up with at least one of them like, seven months ago.

But, I have a serious question for you now that Under the Stairs is over (oh yeah, by the way, this is the final chapter lol).

Would you be more interested in a story where Hermione gets sent to an alternate universe where Draco is good and possibly in a relationship with the alternate Hermione OR a story where Hermione and Draco (and maybe Harry) are sent back to when Hogwarts was first founded, searching for a horcrux which Voldemort froze in time with Salazar Slytherin?

Yep, that is truly all I'm saying about the ideas for the time being.

Let me know!

And don't cry too much about UtS being done! At least it had a happy ending, right?

OKAY OKAY, I'M JOKING, THIS ISN'T THE END. LOL. OHMYGOSH I HAD YOU ALL GOING THERE FOR A SECOND.

Truth is, I have plans for a short continuation on from this. It's going to be full of angst (BECAUSE I LOVE ANGST) and I have no idea when it'll be updated, but I promise I will not abandon it forever. Just like I finally updated this again, I will eventually get around to updating it.

For now I think I'm going to be calling it 'Written in Blood', so to make sure you don't miss it when I post the first chapter, I suggest you click the little button... or whatever it is actually, I don't know... which says subscribe to author stories. You'll get updates other than just Dramione from me, I know, but at least you won't be at risk of missing the exciting finale!

Enough of me trying to get people to subscribe to my stuff. I hope you enjoyed, and please leave a review if you did!

I LOVE ALL OF YOU GUYS SO MUCH!

:D


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